An idea or two about how to catch your #stalker…

Blue field

Experience, when it comes to stalking I know I have more experience now than I did at one time in the past, and I am not sure how to explain it simply.  So I checked Wikipedia for a definition, and it goes like this – “We gained knowledge or skill through involvement or exposure to a thing or event.”  While the range of degrees of experience is quite large, I like this abbreviated definition, it seems to serve the purpose.

We (Steve and I) have been through a stalking, that ended with the murder of our youngest daughter.  We experienced it from beginning to end.

Throughout this horrifying experience we thought we were being proactive.  Many times one of the Sheriff’s Deputies or Detectives would comment on how they thought we were going overboard in what we were doing, in comparison with anything they had seen before.  In our reality what we were doing was our very best to catch this person.  The fact that it ended in failure should give us all pause.  No parent wants to be in our position, and fail.  No parent wants their child to suffer as Morgan did.  They need to protect their child, they need help from others, and just how much, and when is completely unknown.

It is one thing to imagine a peeping tom, who is so transfixed at a young woman’s bathroom window, that the peeping tom does not know that the father of the young woman he is so horribly violating, is coming ever closer, and growing more livid with every step, until it is too late for this peeping tom – he is caught red-handed in the act.

A very old friend of Steve’s had a picture of a man who was caught, by the father of a victim of a peeping tom that was looking in the window at his daughter, and this peeping tom had obviously received a vigorous beating before he was cuffed, and brought in for his mug shot.  A little instant justice, never enough until forgiveness can join in, but perhaps enough for the moment.

It is an entirely different matter when you know it’s happening and you run out an instant too late to find only air.  Oh, there may be clues, shoe prints in the soil, freshly watered soil for just this reason, images on wildlife cameras, grainy video of a real live person, a glimpse of a dark figure rounding the neighbor’s house, foot trails worn into berms behind your house that can be seen from outer space on Google maps, showing trails that were never there before.  Of course let’s not forget the scratching, knocking, and banging on the windows, or punching in numbers on the front door key code pad.

In our case a glimpse or physical evidence of Morgan’s stalker was rare, maybe one in every tenth instance, and never even coming close to her stalker being caught.  We were left with just the knowledge that he was just there.  Proof that your experience tells you – this was from her stalker.  He was right there, not too long ago.  And if you call in law enforcement and nothing improves, and it becomes basically the same thing, except instead of the two of us, there were now one, or two deputies alongside of us, standing there, right where he was, not too long ago.  What are the chances you are going to catch him?  When this is what happens every time, the chances are very slim.

There are jewelry thieves that can scale a building to a balcony, and gain entrance without a noise.  They can defeat the elaborate security system, break into the safe, and exit with the goods, leaving only a safe door half-open, and not any other sign that they were there.

And there are those that will trip, and crash to the ground over paint cans in the garage, causing an intense clatter, knocking themselves unconscious in the process.  There are all levels of skills in stalking, and stalkers, and be realistic about yours – really realistic.  There is the stalker’s skill level vs. your skill level.  And there also is your law enforcement’s skill level vs. the stalker’s.  Not to be insulting or condescending, just take the time to be aware, it matters.

Sadly over the last year, and a half there have been few methods that I’ve seen succeed very often.  Easily the most successful is an array of wildlife cameras, 4 or more, usually six.  They can be wi-fi enabled or not.  Be aware that the time to first exposure varies with brands and models.  Five seconds may be the best you can find, but it is a long amount of time.  Our oldest grandson could pretty much cover our lot from back to front in five seconds.  You can compensate for the slow first image times by using more cameras.  We never had more than two cameras up at one time, four if you count the Sheriff’s two.  It was not enough.  We had two images in three months, and the Sheriffs had none.

The wildlife camera images will not be the best, not prom night pictures by any stretch of he imagination.  The images will have to be circulated to as many people as you can get to see them.  It sounds amazing to me, but if you look at instances where an almost blurry picture is circulated openly, someone recognizes who it is in the image.  A police department in a large city back east claims they have a 75% success rate with video surveillance images openly circulated to everyone.

Next is more of an idea, because we never tried it, but it seems logical.  Where our video surveillance cameras were all mounted on our house, and aimed to cover an area along the house, Steve believes that it would have been better if we had gotten permission, and mounted every camera on a neighbor’s house, trained on one side, at most, of our house, ground to top of roof, 24/7.

Morgan’s stalker was a highly skilled hunter.  Absolutely nothing wrong with hunting, but a highly skilled hunter possesses a skill set of concealment, stealth and knowledge that is formidable to counter.  There is a famous FBI profiler that is of the opinion that if he had a set of suspects for a serial killing, and one was a trophy hunter, that would be his first suspect.  This might also be because the serial killer he brought to justice lived in Alaska and had developed the pattern, or signature, of taking a women into the woods, releasing her, and then hunting her down like an animal.  The theme of many horror movies and TV shows about crime – certainly not representative of the hunters in the world, far from it, just one man using a finely tuned skill set, and knowledge for all the wrong reasons.

On the day Morgan’s body was found it was declared a mystery by law enforcement.  Rule number one of death scene investigation is that you must assume it is a homicide until proven otherwise.  One and a half years later there are twenty unexplainable facts that point to an intruder in her room that night.  Yet the Sheriff’s Department found no sign of forced entry on day one, and were completely satisfied with that. Why?

On the day Morgan died we did not realize there was much of anything wrong with her room.  It was, quite simply, the last thing on our minds.  Very obvious unexplainable facts came readily, within days after the crime scene tape was down.  Others took an evening, with a really sharp investigator, who was experienced with putting together all the facts of a particular case.  Steve and I were never asked a single question about Morgan’s room on day one of her investigation, as it turned out the only day of the investigation, so of course there was not much information assembled about her death.

And these twenty pieces are just the crime scene evidence.  There are also eight pieces of forensic facts relating to Morgan’s case, which are completely backward from what is known by the scientific community, also pointing to an intruder.  When they are testified to and cross-examined, I feel very strongly as to what the outcome will be.  And it is so hard, because as the wheels of justice turn their slow turn, I am very anxious for that moment to come sooner rather than later.

But I’m getting ahead of myself, catching your stalker is the focus here.  There is one thing stalkers almost can’t stop themselves from doing, they stalk and they will return to the same place over, and over again.  Carrying with them an odd, almost unexplainable certainty they will not be caught.  And guess what?  Far too many times they are right about that, about not being caught.

An excellent expert on stalking correctly points out that “you know the place where the crime will be committed,” “you know who the crime will be committed against,” “Once you have a suspect, you must act, quickly.”

Depending on whose numbers you take, in one out of five stalkings there will be violence against the victim, and in one out of ten there will be injuries.  Fatal injuries are next up.  But why?  When there is a suspect, and you know where, and you know who, it does not make sense that anything fatal should happen, except very rarely.  But that is not how it works out.  Extremely sad, but also true.

It is our reality, and the reality for so many stalking victims that they live an end that should not have had to happen, but they are not given the choice.  Can awareness alone improve the odds?  Of course, but I have an idea that three things are needed…awareness, plus protocol, plus full employment of the law.  Stalking needs to be taken seriously – by everyone, especially law enforcement.

Experience tells me that catching the stalker is so important.  Otherwise the end is a wound that may suddenly reopen someday.  Be aware of this.  Morgan chose not to run, because her stalker could just as easily have followed her, and then she would be forever looking over her shoulder in fear.  Morgan decided to stay, that was not the problem.  A lack of awareness, protocol, and full employment of the law was the problem.  Both before her death, and after.

This started out as an idea or two on how to catch your stalker, and I have only given you one or two really good ideas on how to do that – there are many more.  What I want to also give you is the awareness that your stalker must be caught, and preferably not by you.  Stalkers rarely stop stalking.  In Morgan’s memory I want people to more aware of the true dangers of stalking.  I want to turn the tables on stalkers with protocols that have proven to be effective against stalkers, and all of the laws enacted to prevent these tragedies used to their fullest.  How else do we expect to catch your stalker?

Losing sight of the Journey, but finding it again – #love will win!

morganandrainerIt’s a holiday weekend, and as Steve and I press on, one thing that has been very tough for us, has now reached more clarity today.  I am reminded how easily I have lost sight of the journey as we press single mindedly towards the destination.

On the morning Morgan died, we were in absolute shock, and after a brief investigation it was declared, by the lead stalking Detective as officially, “a mystery, ”  that is really how day one of her investigation ended.   As an unknown event, which would require time and information to eventually reveal the truth to us.

The journey has taken us through many twists, and turns.  An amazing beyond description aspect has been how so many have literally come right out of nowhere to supply one piece of information about what happened,  that also happens to be right within their area of considerable expertise.  And how all those little pieces of information have added up to real knowledge about what happened to Morgan, and it has been both mind numbing, and strangely comforting.

It is such a relief to Steve and I to have a sense of what really happened that night, and not be forced to just guess, or accept explanations, that made absolutely no sense at all – So again, to all of you who have donated your time, wisdom, and knowledge, Steve and I thank you for all for your help to aid Morgan, and to help us in a time of untold grief.

The journey we see now still has many twists and turns left to it, but at least we can have great confidence in where we will be coming from.  Be it a criminal court or a civil court, evidence will come, with requirements, and those who give evidence will be of a certain stature, and be speaking from years of experience.  All relaying the truth they have found in the events of that night.

Morgan never really had much of a chance that night.  She succumbed to overwhelming odds.  In the window of time in which she died, shadows are moving on our video, and Sheriff’s patrolled by twice.  It was a bad scene from a bad movie.  The evidence in her room is quite large, but as the Honorable District Attorney has already pointed out, “the Sheriff’s department so thoroughly botched the crime scene that…

Morgan is in a better place now, and that we believe, we feel her presence is priceless to us.  That we have put together a plan that does not rely on a thoroughly botched crime scene portends for closure in the future.

We care for her pets who know that their mommy is gone, they have been through the grieving process too, but are adjusting to a life with us.  They are constant reminders of all the love that Morgan had for this world, and to have them share that with us is something very special.

We wish Morgan was here with us, and it hurts so much that she was taken from the world, her sister, her brother, niece, nephew, her dog Wylah and her cat Mogwai, her horse TC, her soul mate, and all her friends.  The journey begs us to find an answer in all this, to remember all of the happiness there is in all the memories of Morgan, and her life with us.  We work for that moment when we can feel that we did all we could to honor her memory, to shed a bright light where now there are still many lingering shadows, and to truly carry her happiness, and never-ending smile beaming from our hearts.

We have not reached that point yet, but we are getting closer, and to know that we are getting closer, is to believe that we can help to make the world a better place, a safer place, and a place where vicious crimes such as those perpetrated on Morgan can be stopped – before it is too late.

And once again thank you all for the many blessings you have all shared with Steve and I on this journey that we must travel to its end in the name of Morgan, and all of those she is so happy to see us helping.  This is a road that is extremely hard to travel, but travel it we must.  We very much appreciate all the help we have received, and continue to receive along the way.

Exonerate? Does the map of the march around our house implicate?

Footprint trails caught by a sudden snowstorm

Footprint trails caught by a sudden snowstorm

On November 1st, 2011 the March around three sides or our house took place at 11:51 pm.  Not only did the trail, left in the sudden snowstorm, completely avoid the side of the house where Morgan’s windows were it was also silent.  No banging on windows at all.  But it was caught on the video surveillance system, and as for the silence – that would change very soon.

Our neighbor Elliott filled me in on the fact Keenan was gone hunting with his grandfather.  The original blog about this march around the house can be found back in the blog at – November 2, 2011 – Day 93 of Morgan’s stalking – the mysterious march, what does it mean?

It was a hectic time, and the video of the march was not reviewed for a few days, but the footprints were reported to the Garfield Sheriffs department the day they were found.  Steve came home, drew a crude map of just where the trails of footprints seemed to start and stop for the Sheriff’s Deputy while they both walked around and followed the footprint together, and gave a copy to the deputy.

Now as I go through the Sheriff’s reports, doing my best to reconcile the reports with all of the hard evidence we have, filling in the gaps as I go, the very first thing that comes to light about this stalking incident is… there is no report!  None at all that I have been able to find.  And the map Steve drew, and gave the Deputy, that I have not found in the “complete set of Morgan’s Stalking” reports either.  Not the first time by any means, but this was an important one.  At least we still have the video.

Detective Glassmire and Detective Alstatt were at the house four days later on the 6th of November, but the footprints were melted, and gone long before.  Steve drew another map for them and that one did find its way into the official reports, in fact here it is just so you can see my frustration that the original seems to be lost, and it was evidence in a felony stalking case.

So as you look at the map there are three things I would like to point out.  First – notice how one trail of footprints starts at James Harris’ house (where Brooke lived) and stops before the Sheriff’s camera’s location.  When Steve first saw the footprints he thought they looked like someone had walked to a point and then backed up in the same prints all the way to Jim’s house.  He pointed this out the Deputy, as they both walked alongside those prints.

Second – notice were the prints go from the Sheriff’s camera straight to the corner of the house, and then straight back over the berm.  Most of the “V” made by that foot trail to the corner of the house is not caught by our video.  And right in that corner of the house is the tree we think Keenan used to climb up on the roof.  So now I have to wonder aloud, was this march intended to show just how they were getting to that tree to climb up on the roof undetected?  And even worse, does it meant that he had already been in the house to see what the cameras covered, and did so he could establish this route to safely get in order to get to the corner of the house?

Third – the spot marked as start was right by a set of car prints in the street, same place where a loop of footprints ended up.

Also, this was the time that the batteries were dead in the Sheriff’s camera so there were no images captured by that camera.  This was so extremely frustrating for me because I saw that the footprint were right in front of that camera and there batteries were dead!  What was up with that?  A timeline of when which footprints were made would have been very helpful in theories of what was the true intent of all this.

For the next couple of days Morgan had a different pattern of rocks on her windows.  Just as frightening to Morgan, and all of the incidents were reported, but other than my updated timeline emailed to Detective Glassmire detailing the incidents there was no other mention in official reports.  Where are those reports?

Seeing the roof of the house from Google Earth

Seeing the roof of the house from Google Earth

In another image it easy to see how the roof was used in the commission of the stalking.  Point C, is where the tree that was used to get on the roof was.  Point A, is a spot on the roof where a person could lie on the roof and be completely concealed.  Point B is right over Morgan’s bedroom window.  This is right where the rain gutter is torn is half from repeated bending.  Steve walked the entire street inspecting all of the other gutters (all of the houses have them and they all appear to be the same.  In sixteen homes there is not another gutter with a tear in it of any perceptible degree.  Just one spot in sixteen houses and it is exactly centered over Morgan’s bedroom window.  That so many things like this were completely overlooked, disregarded, is completely devastating to Steve and I.

More on the true impacts of stalking…

 

Morgan and her big sister at her sister's wedding

Morgan and her big sister at her sister’s wedding

Last week a convicted murderer entered the sentencing phase.  As a part of that sentencing family members are allowed to speak.  In fact victims of a crime are given a large latitude on their statements to the Judge and jury about how the crime has impacted them personally.

Travis Alexander is not as well known a name as Jodi Arias, he was the man that she stands convicted of killing.  Even less known is that Travis has a brother who did speak about how this tragedy has affected him.  Steven Alexander described for the judge and jury about the emotional and physical toll that he has suffered since the loss of his brother Travis when Travis was murdered back in 2008.  It has been almost five years, and to hear him talk it was just yesterday – except a lot has happened over the years.  He described ulcers, his separation from his wife, and how he has repeated nightmares that he dearly wishes he could stop.

Steven Alexander is a victim, and to hear his words helps to put a face on all the victims of crime, and the need for stronger victims rights in this country.  If existing state laws are placed under a federal umbrella they become stronger.  And they well need to be.  The federal version will come as a constitutional amendment – the first in over 20 years if successful.  It will be a momentous occasion to be sure.

To have heard about Steven and his sad ordeal since his brother’s murder helps to better understand a similar situation within Morgan’s death.  Not yet ruled a murder, because as of yet there has not been a charge filed, but even so the curse that is the life of a victim of crime lives on,  Morgan’s brother has been suffering through his own ordeal, which is very much like the brother of Travis Alexander.

He left his almost life long home here in the Roaring Fork Valley, because he could not bear to live in the place his sister had been killed.  Emotional and physical issues that do not usually belong to a healthy, and active young man in his early thirties have become all too real a part of his life.  He loved his younger sister very much, as did Morgan’s older sister.  Beside Morgan’s brother and sister, Morgan also had a cousin who was more like a sister to her, because she lived with us off and on while growing up.  She was older than Morgan’s brother and younger than Morgan’s sister.  All three girls called Steve daddy, even when they were older, the two older now in their 30’s, Morgan’s brother on the other hand called him dad – much more of a male thing I guess.  I was always called mom, and in my nieces case, she called me Aunt Toni – she called Steve daddy all these years because she never really knew her dad, he left her when she was a baby and Steve treated her as though she was his daughter, she needed a dad for the projects you make in school on father’s day, etc. and Steve very gladly volunteered, and she loved him for that.  We are a very close family, we  love each other very much, and it is very disturbing (even though it shouldn’t matter) when I hear other people say things about us when they don’t even know us.  Do they think to ask Morgan’s close friends (not people that say they were her friends, but her real friends), do they think to ask other kids that we took in to our home over the years, and actually lived with us, and interacted with us?

No they never did, because if they had they would all know that for Morgan to use the words, “I love you, and good night daddy” whenever she said good night to him (like she did the last night of her life) was totally normal – it was what she said every night of her life when she was home, even if she had friends over (it never embarrassed her).  But do these people actually question?  No – they just think they know it all – they think what they hear from strangers is the truth…just like the Sheriff’s Department, did they ever interview Morgan’s close friends, or teachers, or classmates, or the woman she worked part time for?  The answer is no.  If they had they would have known that she had told people that were close to her about her stalker, who he was, and what was going on.  The felony stalking detective assigned to her case spoke with her on an almost weekly basis, and knew what was going on, but Morgan had given up on the Sheriff’s helping her.  I was the one that kept trying to tell her they were getting close to making an arrest, I was the one that blindly believed in them, and believed in what they were telling me.  Morgan was much better at seeing through all the false promises.  Morgan did want her brother to intercede (I was the one that asked him not to), Morgan did want her friends from Aspen to come do stake-outs, and teach this stalker a lesson (as they were biting at the bit to do), but I told her that wasn’t the way to deal with this.

I know now I was wrong, and for Morgan my decision was deadly wrong.  Morgan herself was so angry one day, when she arrived home from school, because she had just endured Keenan staring her down at the same intersection, at the same time she was coming down the hill from school – she had told the detective about this many times, and instead of doing something about it the detective made up excuses that maybe Keenan’s father lived there (he admitted to me months after Morgan was killed that he had no real idea where Keenan or his Father lived, so he just lied to us?) or maybe the car just looked like Keenan’s, but really wasn’t – how dare he try to minimize Morgan’s stalking, and how dare we let him!

Morgan saw Keenan in the car, and identified him – what do stalking victims have to do to get help?  That day she could take it no more, Morgan grabbed a baseball bat when she arrived home from school after another stare down at the intersection, and told me she was going to drive around until she found Keenan, but I told her that was too dangerous, she would not take no for an answer so I followed her out to the car and I went with her to try to keep her safe.  Is this what law enforcement wants victims to do?  Because this is exactly what they forced Morgan to do, to feel she had to take the law into her own hands.  Morgan was angry, and frustrated, not depressed.  Morgan was a strong and amazing young woman that never felt like she needed to rely on others, but her stalker caused her serious emotional distress.

The Detectives called Morgan’s case a “textbook felony stalking”, and were 100% certain who her stalker was.  Morgan saw her stalker in stare downs. And Morgan was a take-charge type of person, but trying to do what law enforcement wanted her to do which was pretty much amounted to just keep a log, and tell them when anything happened, so they could come by after-the-fact, a half hour later usually, and search the grounds.  We all know the protocol failed and ended up costing Morgan her life – and that has to change!

There are so many people that have been impacted by Morgan’s death – people that I have never met, across the country and throughout the world.  Stalking extracts an enormous toll.  For example just recently, after all this time, I have spoken with one person in particular who is the Aunt of Morgan’s friend…the friend she was with her last afternoon on earth.  I know Morgan was very intuitive, and probably had a bad feeling about sleeping at home that night, so when her friend’s Aunt came home from work she asked if she could sleep over her house on her couch – I did not know this until just a few months ago.  Her friend’s Aunt told me the story over the phone, while crying and telling me she felt responsible, because she told Morgan that she was exhausted from a trying day and had a bad headache and didn’t want anyone sleeping over that night.

The “feeling” Morgan had was most likely the reason she snapped at me when she came home that night.  I was waiting for her in the driveway as usual with pepper spray in hand and started to lecture her as she got out of the car because between 4 – 6 pm that day I was unable to reach her by phone or text message, and I was really scared that something might have happened to her.  This was so absolutely NOT a fight like other people have tried to portray.  What parent in this situation would not be frightened, and not say anything, and what young adult would not at least snap back a word in response when they are feeling upset, and nervous about their situation?

You see stalking turns all the tensions to high, and the victims are somehow expected to go on as if nothing is happening.  Not so easy.  People are raised differently – they have different life experiences, and no you can not know what someone says or does not say to their parents when they go to bed at night unless you ask…don’t assume you know, because most likely you will be wrong.  Steve told the Detective that Morgan  was “just Morgan” when he saw her for the last time, “completely normal”, but tired.

We were blessed – all our children, nieces and nephews ALWAYS tell us how much they love us whenever they talk to us, and we tell them.  I believe you should tell the ones you love on a daily basis how much they mean to you – what if you never get another chance?  Until Morgan died I never really thought about that – we just all care about each other, and we were all raised to show our love to one another…for this I feel very blessed.

The stalker who terrorized Morgan walks free as if there was never even a stalking.  And Morgan’s killer at present is leading his normal life after the Sheriff proclaimed that he would never open this case.  Just look back in all of the murders in Garfield County for the last five years for another murder where the Sheriff did open the case, you will not find very many.  And please don’t tell me that is because it is a small County and that’s what happens in small Counties…they don’t have the manpower, they don’t have the budget.  We are talking about human life, and criminals here…excuses don’t cut it.  Where there is a challenge, find a solution!

And as life quickly returned to normal for most – Morgan’s brother has fallen to the ills that so many other victims face when a family member is killed.  It is also why victim’s rights laws have been placed in the revised statutes of most every state.  Because the family members were easy targets for the perps family and friends.  A disgusting loophole that the states have individually started to close, and a pending Federal Constitutional Amendment will unify protection, and take the matter a large step further.

Do not allow this problem to be minimized, If it were not such a problem there would not be such effort to close the doors through litigation.  A constitutional amendment to the United States Constitution should speak volumes to the magnitude of the problem.  And believe me, after all of the threats I have received, either naming directly or sometimes traced back to the family, and friends of Keenan and Brooke, it is another of those things I could never have imagined.

How about the start of real change in the fight against stalkers?

– FRIENDS –

Awareness is becoming a word I will repeat more, and more and I can not thank Sarah Afshar and Yahoo voice enough for helping that cause.  Sarah interviewed me over many days, and was tireless in sharing so many thoughts, and possibilities with me.  Her first article article went live this morning and she had to call me at 2:50 am to tell me, but I did not mind one bit.  Somehow even Wylah knew something good had just happened, because she did one of her, I’m really happy smiles, then she went right back to sleep.  So here is the link – please read it when you get a chance, and also notice the links button that has just been added to the top of the blog, the important links will always be there too.

http://www.sarahafshar.com/2014/04/morgan-ingram-exclusive-interview-with.html