These are pictures of Morgan’s dog, Wylah. I truly believe Wylah still remembers her last night with Morgan. She has nightmares at times, and seems wary of people who look similar to the “suspect.” I know Wylah misses Morgan, and many times I see her staring at something that isn’t there, with a smile on her face, and love in her eyes. If only I knew what she was seeing and thinking…
This time of the year is always difficult, but this year is even a little harder than usual. It has been 11 years since we had to face our first Christmas without Morgan, and it has never been the same since. Our family, especially our grandchildren, have kept love alive in our lives. I don’t know what I would have done without them. The pain of missing Morgan is a daily occurrence that will never go away, but we are grateful for the strength our family has given us.
For so many families like us, this time of the year is exceptionally challenging. I wish everyone love, peace, and justice going into the New Year.
Thank you all for following this blog, and sending so much love and encouragements throughout the years, it means the world to me.
Morgan loved winter, especially when it snowed.
Happy first day of winter to you all.
Wishing you all the very best winter, full of love, wonderful experiences, and memories, with the ones you love. Remember, every moment of every day with your loved ones is so very important, because you never know when those moments may end.
Missing Morgan so very much, but also so very happy we have so many happy memories of our time with her. Every moment counted and Morgan was pure love.
11 years ago today was the most horrific day of our lives. It changed our lives forever, and our family will never be the same again. Every day, I wish it had been me, and not her. I would trade my life in a heartbeat for hers, but I was not given the chance.
Many people in power would like us to go away. They would like us to forget what happened, and just go along with their false narrative. But, here’s the thing…the facts and the evidence show the truth about what really happened to Morgan. She died at the hands of another.
So, no matter what lies others would like us to believe, in order to make their lives easier, the truth never changes, and justice still needs to be served for Morgan!
December 2, 2011 was the beginning of our fight for justice, and we will NEVER give up!
December 2, 2011
Our neighbor Mark pulled into his driveway next door, a few minutes after midnight. He looks at our house, and sees Morgan’s lights are off. One of my nieces can’t sleep without the TV on. For others they may need a bedside light, or even just the soft glow of a nightlight, but Morgan liked no lights on at all, so what Mark saw was the norm.
Another sheriff deputies’ patrol of the neighborhood happened at 1:21 AM. This was the drive right through patrol, it took 35 seconds to loop the end of the street, and drive back by – no stopping, no shining their spot light. The second patrol of the early morning came by at 2:44 am. This time there was a complete stop between our house and our next door neighbor Rhonda’s, a searchlight flooding our roof, this patrol took closer to one minute to make the loop, and do a visual of the roof.
Why did they know to check the roof with their light? We never knew about the roof until months after Morgan’s death. Our roof was how the stalker was able to hide.
For almost exactly an hour, it all looked quiet, then the motion detector light on the corner of the garage goes on. For the one and only time, during the lifetime of the video surveillance of our house, a young deer, a fawn walks, and then trots by Morgan’s window.
Our neighbor Mark came out to warm up his car just before 4:30 AM, and he notices something, Morgan’s bathroom light is on. This was out of character, Morgan was not an early riser. Mark drives off at 4:36 AM.
Steve remembers getting out of bed after 5:30 AM. He has been awake for a while and decides to make it official. He makes coffee and sits at the kitchen table reading over some floor plans. His current project is at the state where no mistakes comes with an explanation mark, and he reviews the details. I lie awake before 6:00 AM, but the smell of Steve’s coffee is too much, I get up, pull on a fuzzy, warm robe and join him in the kitchen for just a second, I then had a thought pass through my mind, why hasn’t Morgan woken me up yet to take out her puppy to go potty?
Across the valley, Scott, a very good family friend woke up much earlier than usual. He looked outside, and found something extra special in this mornings sunrise. So, he grabbed a camera that was on the table behind him, and went outside to capture it. He presented us with the photo of the sunrise coming up from Aspen, as it came up over the mountains, clearly showing here comes the snow – months later, safely mounted in a very special frame that he made, he gave it to us – it was the sunrise on the morning that we found Morgan’s body. The fresh snow we were all waiting on came one day too late for us…no prints in the snow last night, because it hadn’t snowed at all.
Steve is engrossed in his plans, and as Morgan has not called me yet to take her puppy Wylah out, I just decide to go and take her out. When I enter Morgan’s room, I notice her bathroom light is on, and the puppy and cat are both sitting next to each other in the bathroom looking bewildered, a something is not right sensation comes over me. Up until this time, they never went by each other, Morgan’s cat Mogwai wanted nothing to do with the puppy. I notice Wylah has had an accident on the floor. Morgan looks like she is sleeping and doesn’t wake up when I call for her puppy to come to me. I take her puppy out to the backyard, as I had every single morning since Morgan was shocked into retreat by her stalker, after he showed up in our yard only 10 feet from Morgan. I thought of how fearful she felt that morning, as I scanned the yard for anything that looked out of place, while Wylah did her morning potty thing out in the back yard. So many times I had wanted him (the stalker) to be here, I wanted him to challenge me, and I wanted to take him down.
Wylah seemed apprehensive this morning, and took extra time to find the perfect spot to complete her business, and then she was quick to get back inside. She would usually sleep after she went potty until Morgan woke up, and now I brought her back to Morgan’s room. Wylah hopped on her Morgan’s bed, and looked at me. The oddness was growing, Morgan would have thanked me for taking her out, but she had not. And now I was expecting to hear words from our daughter before I went to join Steve for some coffee and some breakfast. There were no words.
So, I asked her, “Aren’t you going to say thanks for cleaning Wylah’s accident, and taking her out Morgan?”
There was still no response. I looked again and it was all very odd. Morgan was over here, when she always slept over there. Her position didn’t even look right, The blankets, her nightstand, the floor, as it all began to grasp me, but I shook it off. Touching her on the shoulder she felt warm, even though her shoulder had not been covered up. Morgan was usually a ‘burrow under the covers’ sleeper, and there was not a hint of burrow here. I shook her shoulder gently, so as not to startle her, and said her name.
Again, she made no noise, and right then I needed Steve! Like those times when Daddy makes the crying stop, right now Daddy was going to wake her up – he had to.
I left her bedroom door open and quickly went toward the kitchen, and yelled for Steve. He sensed it immediately, and was up and rushing quickly towards me, as I turned the corner.
“Something’s wrong, Morgan won’t wake up. I told him, and he did not accompany me back to the room, he ran past me and was kneeling on her bed at her side by the time I got there. He was shaking, then shaking more. Then his words were “Oh, no, Oh, no, in a tone of disbelief.
“Call 911, NOW!” – those are words I will never forget. I was frozen in place and had not moved when Steve rolled Morgan onto her back, and her eyes, oh, her beautiful eyes, Morgan’s soft pools of blue that held such happiness, and wonder for twenty years seemed to be grotesquely stretched in irregular shapes up her face, and turned to a shiny dark black. As if she had just become possessed – they were wide open, and a bolt of goodness was needed to be shot into her to return Morgan to Morgan.
Steve had started CPR and was counting out loud, he repeated the NOW of my instructions. The room could have spun, but seemed to be only starting to spin and then stopping. I was across the hall in my office dialing the numbers, and I could hear Steve’s counting, over and over again. Then I heard him scream, “Morgan take my breath, breathe!”
I was connected to 911 emergency, but the nature of my emergency was unimaginable to try to explain. We needed help, fast… they were coming. I told Steve they were on the way, but he could not hear me. He was screaming for Morgan. I could hear his words, but I would not let myself understand his words.
The 911 operator told me that we needed to get her onto something firm, the floor, so I ran back into Morgan’s room and helped Steve move her. I saw my daughter’s face and in a quick flash it looked blue, I could not bear to look at her eyes, so I looked down to the floor at her feet, and grasped her ankles to feel her warmth. In that very moment I had a “flash,” or what you might call a “download” of information…I knew Morgan was no longer in her body, I felt her whispering to me that she was safe now, no one could her anymore, and she was still on her journey. A huge blast of warmth hit my spine, like when she used to put her hand on my back when I was upset. I truly believe Morgan was trying to get me through this horrific moment.
Steve continued CPR – he wanted to help her breathe, and I heard him say “oh, no” again. I looked at him and he looked back at me, he wanted to say something, I don’t think he knew the I already knew she was dead. Instead he shook his head and told me to move my car, to get it out of the driveway, so the ambulance could pull right up to the door.
It was dead quiet as I ran outside, but then it was like I was in a trance…I guess once I got outside, my brain couldn’t comprehend what was happening. It went into protect mode, like this was only a dream. I walked to the car, unlocked it and looked inside to see if I needed to remove any of Morgan’s ballet shoes, so the cold wouldn’t damage them. It makes no sense now, but I think my mind just wanted me to do all the normal things I would usually do, so this could go back to being a ‘normal’ morning, and nothing was wrong. I so desperately wanted to believe this wasn’t really happening.
I walked back into the house and Steve yelled, “Are they here yet?” All of a sudden, I snapped out of my trance, and ran back outside, realizing that I did not move the car! There was no one on the street, I raced back down the driveway and jumped into the car, that was in front of the garage, and backed it out into the street. As I ran back towards the front door, I saw them – men searching, waving flashlights, dressed in thick overalls, and carrying all kinds of devices, they were at the wrong house, down the street. I ran back out into the street, my arms were crossing over my head, as I waved and yelled for them to all come in this direction.
The recognition and movement was instant, it seemed like a small army coming from every direction, descending on our front door. “She’s in here”, I kept repeating and they did not pause to acknowledge, they just rushed by me. They already knew what to do, and were in her room in an instant. Steve was leaving Morgan’s room as I came in, and Wylah sat on her bed, never making a sound, just staring quietly as the men rushed into Morgan’s room.
Steve and I hung onto each other in the foyer, as we backed toward my office door. I wanted a do over, I wanted to hit a reset button. I said to myself, “This is all a bad dream, I will wake up any time now and this won’t be happening.” This was not supposed to be how it ended, not by a long-shot I can’t remember if I said it out loud or only thought it. I wanted a do-over so I could take Morgan far, far away from all this horrible situation. I could see the EMT’s hooking up their machine to “zap” her heart…nothing happened, they tried everything, but to no avail. Morgan was already dead. I saw them lower their heads. They looked so defeated, so sad.
The first responders are now asking about Carbon Monoxide. It was so cruel to flash on memories of the Carbon Monoxide exposure Morgan suffered through years ago, how much it had hobbled her, and how she fought through it, and had completely recovered. I thought, “Could she have died from Carbon Monoxide?” We had a detector, just outside of her room, just above the countertop in the laundry room, so Steve went to check the readings. It had pegged a super high reading during the night, but the alarm never went off. We had no idea how that could have happened until sometime later, when Steve did the research into it, and found that these monitors will register a super high reading if exposed to certain gasses, like Chloroform.
Morgan lay lifeless on her bedroom floor now, the thoughts of how and why would come later, only that she was no longer with us was what mattered to us. A short while ago, without a word between us, Steve and I had come to realize that our baby girl was no longer with us. We didn’t want to believe it. The responders brought new hope with their urgency, but they were now slowing to the reality that there was nothing they could do, whispering to each other in very hushed tones. Bringing all of their devices back out to their trucks.
We were both in shock – we didn’t know what to do – Steve started making calls, just the ones he had to tell straight away (how do you tell her brother and sister, who loved her more than anything, that she was dead?), then he went to the living room and sat on the couch just staring at the wall. The rest could wait until later. I would make some calls myself, but it would not be until much later – I wanted to be alone with my thoughts for awhile.
Mothers have connections with their children, and share bonds not easily understood. Mothers were not meant to say goodbye like this to their children. Yet, I stood in the entry of our house and I stared into her room at what was only her body now. I knew that Morgan was gone, and as strange as it sounds, that in itself was a comfort to me, no one could hurt her. Later I would wonder what she had really been through and how much she had been made to suffer. I knew that for today, it would be a matter of making the magnitude of this singular event have the meaning it deserved. At this time I trusted those moving about and carrying out their tasks. Later on I came to realize that it wasn’t to be trusted. We were asked to leave our house as they had crime scene tape up and had declared this a crime scene.
Chatter about the death of Morgan Ingram was the morning news, and I am sure that those involved wanted to be sure nobody was talking about them, and interestingly enough, they had already started floating lies about that night. The facts and truth would come over the course of time, following the realization, and deduction of many, many experts.
Law enforcement, who were involved in her death scene assured us that there was no sign of forced entry (as many of you now know from other cases in the news, this does not mean an intruder was not in the house), no sign of a struggle (much later we were able to see signs of a struggle and wounds on her body, in pictures that had been kept from us), no sign of suicide, no sign of sexual assault (they never even tested for this)…and we believed them. They never took fingerprints, they didn’t collect any evidence, only items that belonged to Morgan. They said we now had to wait for the autopsy – when that was completed and the forensic pathologist could find nothing wrong with her that would cause her death, he said we had to wait for the toxicology results. They came back about 4 weeks later with no sign of alcohol, no sign of any illegal drugs and her manner of death was now called “natural.” We asked how could that be? Morgan was a healthy 20-year-old.
Whatever Steve and I thought at that moment on that morning, it was all about to change. In the most irrevocable and illuminating way. . .
On December 13, 2012 – We moved from that house within a month, we were in shock, the both of us not properly processing what had, and what was happening. Before we moved, every single day I would look at the front door and think Morgan would be walking through at any moment greeting our dog Tessi with, “Well, hello beautiful.” It was all too much to endure.
Over the next nine months, what was declared a mystery that day, would only become more mysterious:
Morgan’s stalking ended with her death. The interviews and collection of evidence planned for her that very next week were cancelled in view of her death. The detective said, “No Morgan, no stalker to prosecute.”
The most important part of a mysterious unnatural death is the investigation that follows. The dignity and honor of the deceased rest with how thorough and complete that investigation into the death is. Morgan deserves for her death to have an investigation, and it most certainly did not, as the blog shall shift from the stalker to the investigation of her death, and the answer of just who or how many were in her room that night. Because it is obvious that Morgan alone could not possibly have done what is documented to have happened on the 123rd day – the last day of her stalking. Please pray for justice for Morgan. Thank you.