Category Archives: Toni’s reflections

In Defense of Dr. Phil – Was there more to it than what you saw?

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An Orchid for Morgan

An Orchid for Morgan

The Dr. Phil show was intense. They contacted us without reservation for weeks in advance, and were very detail oriented. The questioning, research, interviewing and production of documents for that one hour segment far, far eclipsed any investigation into Morgan’s death by the authorities.

So why were so many people unhappy with Morgan’s moment on that show? Other than the obvious that we all love her, and want only the best for Morgan, there are other facts that I really want to share in all fairness.

First, as with any good multi-layered crime as this there was maneuvering – oh was there ever maneuvering. The show wanted an opposing point of view to ours, that made perfect sense. So they asked the Forensic Pathologist Dr. Kurtzman, which would have made Dr. Dobersen’s presence even more important, and would have made for a few moments Steve and I would have really looked forward to. But no, Dr. Kurtzman would not go on national TV to talk about Morgan. The Sheriff was invited, but he would not speak about Morgan’s death, or her felony stalking case on national TV. The Sheriffs department has a media officer, who’s job it is to publicly represent Garfield Sheriff’s department, she was offered up as a possibility, but then pulled off the proverbial table. The Coroner, as we understand, never returned the call. Then there was Keenan and his Mother. After consulting with their legal counsel the decision was made that the criminal exposure was far too great, and they completely declined to appear. Their lawyer made a statement for them for the show.

Of course the possibilities were dwindling and there was Brooke Harris, and perhaps Brooke’s dad, James Harris. To do this they had to appear before a judge, and do even more maneuvering. I believe Brooke and Brooke’s dad wanted to go on the show, but they needed to temporarily waive a TRO, and I believe they did. They also needed counsel to accompany them, so as not to risk the criminal exposure theory. And I say it this way, because I really do not understand it completely, but that is what their lawyer said to the judge. I asked our lawyer if we needed him to come with us as well, as it seemed like a quite popular idea. He explained that no – he said we had no potential criminal exposure, so we did not have to concern ourselves with protecting against criminal exposure.

All this just to sit on a stage and explain our story, and answer questions. Of course I was going, and of course I was going to tell the world all about Morgan. I honestly could not imagine ever saying no. And as for all the maneuvering so far, maybe this is how it always goes, I can say I understand, but even Steve said, “I must be missing something here.” Somehow that made me feel better about it all.

Then came the whirlwind of days of taping, ending with the live taping on stage. I am going to estimate that about 1/4 of what was taped made it to the final show. There were such interesting moments. Mostly Steve asked, but a few times I would ask a simple straight forward question, and there would be nothing in return. Not yes, no, can’t remember, I have to take the 5th on that one, nothing. Those moments, without exception, did not make it to the show. Their counselor sat in the audience and was asked a question toward the very end. He stood up and said things that shocked me. People out in the audience connected with Steve and I after the show was over and offered to testify to what they had witnessed, because they were so outraged that an attorney could say those vile things. To those of you whom we have never met before and would offer to travel halfway across the country to testify for our daughter Morgan, Steve and I want to publicly tell you how much that means to us, and the fight against stalking, of which all of us are all a part of now. Nobody’s little girl should ever, ever have to suffer what happened to Morgan.

But back to Dr. Phil, he is so calm, and confident that I doubt it bothered him, but I felt that his hands had to be at least a little tied behind his back by all this maneuvering that went on. The producer of the show did ask me to please not blog about the show until after it had aired. I said of course, after everything they were enduring to get Morgan’s story out, it was the least I could do, although I was excited, and did want to share as it was happening.  There are 2 great things that have come from the Dr. Phil show, first it did a great job of raising awareness about the dangers of stalking – so many thousand of people contacted me after the show, through this blog to share their stories and support for Morgan. The second thing was that we now have on national TV, Brooke and James Harris lying through their teeth – lies that we can prove…and one day in court this will be priceless.

For Morgan’s justice there will now be many moments, good and bad, as parents Steve and I simply ask what she is supposed to be afforded by the law – to be treated with fairness, respect, and dignity. I thank Dr. Phil for doing that, also Ed and Eric at KDNK, our local radio station for their series on Morgan, and stalking in our valley, Sarah Afshar, for her interview on Yahoo, and Jennifer Shaffer for her priceless advice and her calming voice, always at just the right time. And to all of you willing to join in the fight against stalking, it really is for all of humanity.

And I just have to add this: for all the readers, the family that is now part of this blog, picture the producer looking at me and asking, “Toni, can you tell me why I am getting so many emails about how I have to put you on the show, it just doesn’t end?” I shrugged my shoulders for him, but I really knew that it was all of you contacting the Dr. Phil show that made it happen. Thank You!

Investigative Reporting on Morgan’s Stalking and Murder by a Local Radio Station

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Ed Williams, reporting for our local radio station KDNK Carbondale just ran a series of reports on the radio about our daughter’s case – I am attaching the link so you can listen if you like.

Every day that pasts so many of you readers have forwarded me evidence that we did not even know about, and we so greatly appreciate it…that’s why between Team Morgan and Morgan’s Army of Angels I know when we finally get the whole investigation together, with all the evidence this case will be reopened.  There is still a stalker/murderer out there so don’t kid yourself.

There are thousands of people in our world that have experienced horrific stalking, and LE was never able to help them, and in some cases completely blew them off, and they are lucky to be alive.  The toll that has been taken on all these stalking victims is immense, and the common thing they tell me is they have learned not to count on law enforcement – this is so wrong!  Law enforcement can not always catch or save everyone, but they need to wake up and realize if something they are doing is not working – fix it and try to save people.

I have spoken with other families across the United States that have gone through this same process, and in those cases it took between 3 – 15 years to get a conviction, because their children were deemed a suicide without the proper investigation.  It took the families everything they could muster to hire other professionals (other than LE), and put together a case that could go to a higher LE agency, and then get reopened in order to get a prosecution.  We have been told to pace ourselves, and keep doing what we are doing and eventually there will be an arrest…and we will!

Milestones along the journey

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As the frantic pace from last week slows to a far more manageable speed, I want to thank all of you so much for for your help, your kind words, your encouragement, and of course your support for Morgan.  She was the victim, and Steve and I have always said that if just one other young woman is saved, this will all be worth it.  And we cherish very dearly the successes this effort has already had.

I did say milestone in the title and one they tell me one that will be reached today is 3 million views!, in 111 countries.  I asked exactly what a “view” is and it was explained like this.  If one of you comes on the Blog and reads a post and then clicks on a link that takes you to another post, or a page of stalking advice. That would be 2 views, made sense to me, so it is not 3 million individual people, just 3 million views.  A very overwhelming number to me and one that I would never have dreamed of when I started this blog about Morgan’s Stalking.  I think it just underscores what a real nightmare stalking and bullying is for us all, all across the globe.

Also our local radio station in the valley KDNK will air a 3 part series starting on Monday 11/12 at 6:50 am and 7:50 am, about Morgan Ingram’s Stalking and what they have learned in their research of her stalking.  If you miss a broadcast it will also be available on their website. http://www.kdnk.org/ (The 3-part series can now be heard on https://soundcloud.com/user-744545581/kdnk-series)

I haven’t had a chance to preview any of it but they really dug into the subject and Steve and I are so grateful for the exposure of this very important subject.

Thank you all and I look forward to meaningful improvement to the current awareness of how dangerous stalking can be and how inadequate our current protocol is when dealing with stalking and bullying.

 

 

Monday, November 14th – Day 105 of Morgan’s Stalking – He’s hiding in the tall grass – and why are the sheriff’s batteries always dead?

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Morgan’s favorite lunch – peanut butter, honey and bananas

Morgan has been feeling sick, and she ignores a text from her friend in Savannah, just past midnight at ~ 12:44 am, “When is your Dad’s bday?” What a way to start November 14 – it is now Steve’s birthday!

We have a lot of activity in the morning from the stalker, and for some reason Steve is up, and ready.  Like he knew it was coming.  For the first time in a week he has the thermal imaging scope out, and is dressed all in black, when I see him go out the back door at  4:48 am, right after Morgan alerts us to rocks on her window.

I ask him if I should call the sheriffs, as he goes out he says no.  He has a black aluminum baseball bat in his free hand, and I hope he finds something worthy of a swing.  Steve was quite a home run hitter in his younger days.

I try to watch him from the back windows, and I have lost all sight of him, as I go around the house trying to pick out where he is.  Normally the outside motion detectors would be announcing his actions around the house, but this time there is nothing they are picking up on. Whatever he has decided to do this morning, he is under cover.

He calls me at 5:45 am, it is still pitch black outside, and I ask him what is up.  He has picked up two trails in the grass, and has located an area on the berm where he can clearly see the heat signature of where a body that was lying in the tall grass.  He has been watching deer as they come through, and is very familiar with how they present on the thermal imaging and he is convinced this was a person.  He is still close by so he whispers to me. Call the deputies and tell them I have heat signatures across the yard. Tell them to come in from the north side, our side of the street.

This is a different Steve, he has never had me direct the officers before.  My chest is racing I think he must see something to have said that.  One of the officers on the way calls and he has a thermal imaging scope also. Probably much better than ours and he will circle back in from the end of the street.  I tell him Steve is on the berm and has located two spots where a body was hiding.  The deputy is excited and shortly after our phone call I hear a truck race by the front of our house.

This seems too good to be true, we are working together and putting technology to work in order to catch the stalker.  Steve calls me and says he see their flashlights coming, he wonders why they always use their flashlights, you can see them so easily.  My Steve and Officer Steve P. from the sheriff’s department meet up out on the berm between our neighbor Rhonda’s house and ours.  I can see them standing there and talking, pointing at the ground.

They split up and Steve comes straight for the back door.  I unlock it and let him in, this is pathetic, were his first words.  He is very angry. Something was moving down at his end and he could not see it.  Because his batteries were dead.  Of course he can’t take batteries from us because, what, we might catch the guy?  He won’t take my thermal scope, because that is against policy.  Steve says he told him, maybe we should rent the Unicorn hot air balloon for the day, but he didn’t understand, or wanted to choose to ignore him.  He was coming right at them Steve tells me, right at them.  I thought they had night vision, could have spotted him easily.  This is a nightmare times two!

Morgan is wandering down the hall and wondering what is up.  She tells Steve, it’s just rocks against my window daddy, it’s OK I can take it.  He offers to make her French toast, and she perks up quite a bit.  “But it is your birthday.”  Morgan tells him.  “Yes, it is and I want to make you breakfast.”  Which he does, for us all.

Detective P. and Detective M. knock at the front door apologizing about the dead scope, and promising that they will have it working next time.  I was extremely disappointed, but I don’t tell him the same thing happened to the detectives last time they were here, and then I say good bye.

We have a wonderful breakfast and Morgan goes about getting ready for school.  Steve tells me this is just not fair.  Morgan is giving this all she has, more than anyone ever should, and it has just become one screw up after the next.  He tells me we have to hold them more accountable.  To actually have live batteries is not that big of a request he feels.  I know they think this stalker is harmless, but you never know Steve tells me.  First the car was keyed before the stalking started, with the word BITCH on it (down to the metal and the Carbondale police officer (not the Garfield County Sheriffs) said that it is usually a sign of someone with deep seated problems or on drugs), with lots of anger and who knows what they do next.  I don’t like this at all.

I agree with Steve, they don’t seem to be very serious at all, just going through the motions, and it is having a big affect on Morgan’s life.

Steve leaves for a project he is working on in Aspen, and Morgan comes back out at 10:27 am to announce a text she just received from her instructor, “No class today.  Had to pick up daughter from school.  Homework due Wed.  Classical vs Neoclassical.”  Then she answers her friend in Savannah who was wondering about Steve’s birthday.  At 10:48 am, she tells him, “Today. HaHa.”

Morgan is worried about her Dad, he seemed extra stressed this morning, and I tell her it is wearing on us all and he wants it over.  Morgan assures me that she is fine.  She feels safe as long as she is in the house.  That actually for her the worst part is driving up the street, once she is in the front door she feels like everything is OK.

Today is October 28, 2012 – Another weekend has been spent with lists, timelines and more evidence – more then I ever thought we would have about Morgan’s death.  The order to bring it all out, and through which communication medium, was a big decision today.  Last year after our meetings in Los Angeles we had a very ambitious plan that has now been scaled back.  Raising awareness is still our biggest goal, and our most successful to date.  Justice for Morgan is still very problematic.  We know what happened to her, that she never really stood a chance in her last 24 hrs of life, but presenting what we know and preserving the possibility of eventual prosecution is not at all so easy, as I would have thought.  I miss my little girl so much and I want to do what is right, so waiting for a few more decisions this week will be something I can do.  Steve and I have had so many offers for help that we are humbled by the love and understanding that Morgan’s story was able to spread in the world.  We pray for the strength to do justice to what she had already accomplished in her lifetime.

The chatter on our tipline about stalkers being cornered, and stopped by the lessons we learned and that are being shared with us is very satisfying.  Morgan’s stalker was a very talented individual, in a sick sort of way, and reading about what happened to Morgan has actually helped many other individuals.  It has been more than satisfying for Steve and I, that methods we employed that were useless for us, have been very successful for others.  And have so changed the perceptions of how to correctly confront your stalker for so many others.  It is not the end I had hoped for when Morgan was still alive, but now I gladly take it, in the memory of Morgan and for all of those it is helping. But this doesn’t mean we are giving up – NEVER!  And I am still very confident that a law enforcement agency will step up to the plate and take over this investigation.  Thank you all for so many signatures to our petition to the Governor of Colorado – we will continue to take signatures (only 300 left to go) and then we will be presenting it to him.

Click here to read about the 106th day of Morgan’s stalking https://morgansstalking.com/?p=2071

October 5, 2011 – Day 65 of Morgan’s Stalking – Faces in the Sky

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Faces in the Clouds

Cool rock formations from Hawaii and More

Morgan took this picture in Hawaii and I said, “What a cool rock formation,” and Morgan said, “Mom! – Look at all the faces in the clouds!!!”

In the wee hours of the morning, at 22 past midnight Morgan texts me “You aren’t still up, are you?” I was, and I feel like she caught me, I answer “Yes, why?” Morgan says, “Nevermind.” Now she’s really caught me and I ask her “Why are you still up?” Which is a silly question of course, 20-year-old girls stay up late. Before she had a stalker she would be up working on some project or watching movies or talking on her phone till way late all the time. Now she was tired and interested in a good nights sleep, as much as we were. Morgan does not answer, and I let it go at that.

At 1:12 am the motion light outside the back of our room goes on. I reach over for Steve, but he is already awake and grabs my arm before I can tap him. That startles me deeply, everything seems to startle me now. There is a crash noise right outside and Steve doesn’t bother with lights or clothes and just hops up and runs out our back door. I get up and lift the blinds. I don’t see anything, not even Steve. Which is a concern, but then I see him coming over the berm. He sees me and shakes his head.

When he’s back inside he tells me that he thought he saw something, maybe a man, hard to be sure. He went as far as over the berm and then he saw nothing, he just stood there and froze and waited for something to move, but the cold eventually convinced him to come back in. There is always a next time and we go to sleep.

Morgan calls me in the morning and wants to go see her doctor. She is in pain, her back has been hurting more and more. I think it was sleeping on the closet floor all that time, and Morgan thinks it is just stress. I told her, of course go see the doctor – she doesn’t miss class very often, so once is not going to be that big of a deal.

Morgan sends her teacher a text message, “I am going to run to the doctor this morning so I’m going to miss class. I’ll see you tomorrow!!” Her teacher texted back, “OK.”

She goes to see her doctor and he helps by realigning her back, tells her she has strained her hip and needs to be careful on it for a week or so until it really feels better. Dr. Jensen is a great holistic doctor and Morgan really trusts him.  She is so much happier when she gets home. I tell her that her deal with her dad to not wake me is off and I promise I won’t talk or call, but just to send me a blank text whenever there is a noise against her window that wakes her.  She is a tough sell, but finally agrees.

That night as we are going to bed I tell Steve the new plan with Morgan and he says I will never be able to do it. I tell him something like, just watch me. Then at 1 minute before 11:00 pm she sends me one bubble on my phone. I didn’t realize how hard it would be. I lie there having to know if it was a little noise or a big noise, or if she was sleeping soundly or lightly.  I want to know something, but a deal’s a deal, and I let her sleep. And then I lay there wide awake.

Today is October 3, 2012 – I miss Morgan a lot today, I move throughout my day for my job, but otherwise I feel like I am not doing enough for Morgan. I asked her friends to write something about Morgan when they get a chance, and her best friend wrote the most beautiful thing. I read it to Steve and he said, “True friends, so hard to find, and even harder to have taken away.” We know it’s hard for her friends to sit down and write something – they are still dealing with the loss, just like us. This past Saturday night we met with two of her friends and one of them said to us that it was the first time he could face us to talk about Morgan, because it hurt so much. We both miss her a little more right now.  I’m not sure why. The pain never goes away.  So many people are working hard to help her, and us – to get the truth out.  And I really want to tell them all thank you again, Morgan and Steve and I appreciate what you are doing so very much. We could not do what we are doing without all of your help, it means the world to us while we still continue to fight an uphill battle to try to get justice for Morgan.  It seems like there are also people out there that don’t care about the truth, they only want to be right, and for them I feel sorry, because the truth is there, and won’t change.

Click here to read about the 66th day of Morgan’s stalking https://morgansstalking.com/?p=1576