Thought for the day: LOVE IS EVERYWHERE…From Morgan on May 15, 2011

Morgan was always about love. She always said, “I love you,” whenever she had a chance…and it was often. The Facebook post above was in the Spring of 2011, when Morgan was 19. It was only 2 & 1/2 months before her “active stalking” started. She did not know that at that time her whole world would soon change, and she had no idea that the vandalism on her car, that had taken place only 3 months earlier, that past February, was just the beginning of her stalking. 

She drew little hearts everywhere, even on the back of her jeans, in flour, while baking 🙂

Morgan knew and saw love always and for that I am happy. She did not delude herself, she knew there was ugliness in the world but, she believed love would win in the end…and so do I.

I will always love you Morgan!

Is Media A Good Thing – Even If They Are Stuck On A False Narrative?

Because of my work with so many families of homicide victims, some years back, I was asked if I thought co-victims, families like ours, should allow the media to showcase their stories. Seems like an easy decision, but it was not. After giving it a little thought I replied, “When it comes to the media you are looking at the good, the bad and the ugly.”

You are always taking a chance that when they tell your story, the media will not reflect the truth, but instead they will float whatever false narrative they believe will gain viewership for their show – it’s all about the drama.

I then continued on to say, “With that in mind, I still believe any, and any media coverage that will keep the story out in the public’s mind is not only a good thing, but it also raises the publics awareness of these types of crimes, which is always good for everyone.”

Life is a constant flow of ups and downs, highs and lows, and I get that. I try very hard not to allow the “downs” to keep me down for very long, because if I allowed that to happen then any forward movement on my part would disappear. So, even though the woman with the ultimate authority for the Oxygen show, when they filmed Morgan’s story back in 2019, chose to air only the things that supported her false narrative, I am still glad I decided to do the show. Why, you may wonder?

At that time, after 7+ years of pressing for answers in the death of our youngest child, Morgan, we had learned many things. We had learned that we are in this for the long haul; we need to keep digging ourselves, along with the help of others, digging for answers, as we seek truth and justice for Morgan. We can’t always do everything ourselves – we need others…others with other resources, so with that in mind, I can honestly say that because of Kelly McLear’s investigation, we were able to receive so much more EVIDENCE, evidence that we did not have before, shocking evidence that is hard to believe law enforcement kept from us, evidence that supports the theory that Morgan was murdered, so you could say the show was bad because they did not air all the evidence that proved she was murdered, or you could say it was good because we now have that evidence and can use it in a court of law, once a new investigation is opened into her murder.

Many questions have been filled in because of Kelly’s great questions and interviews with people that had never been questioned before by the sheriffs. Up until now there has NEVER been an investigation into her murder by law enforcement, even though many, many experts have said there is plenty of evidence that she did not die of natural causes (like the pathologist said for the first 8 months), and she did not die from suicide (which the pathologist changed eight months later, after we would not stop investigating and he threatened me to ‘back off!’ So, again, was the show a bad thing or a good thing? In the long run, just like all families of murder victims, we want answers and we want justice, so I feel, in the long run  it was a good thing…


Yesterday I woke to a dream & Morgan was there…

Yesterday was my birthday…it has been 11 years now since I spent my last birthday with my sweet Morgan, and as you can probably understand, it was an emotional day for me.

I remember how excited Morgan was to watch me open the present she had given to me on that day in 2011. It was a black iron cow bell that I could hang on the outside of the house – the kind you ring to let everyone know it’s time to come in for dinner. I loved it!

Steve had designed and built, with his own two hands, the horse ranch that we lived in in Old Snowmass, CO. It was the place where Morgan was born. She knew I missed the ranch – there were so many wonderful memories made there. This present brought tears to my eyes. We were planning on building another home where we could have a ranch again…those plans disappeared, along with Morgan, 5 months later.

This is where Morgan was born, learned to walk, learned to talk, learned her love for nature, and all creatures large and small.

I love all my beautiful memories of Morgan, but they also bring tears to my eyes, especially on days like yesterday. Even though it was an emotional day for me, I am also extremely grateful…Morgan was in my dream that night, and I remembered every little detail of the dream when I woke up on my birthday morning.

It was a happy dream, it was as if she was there with me, celebrating my birthday. In the dream, the two of us were walking out to the driveway, we were going out for a birthday lunch. We were going to meet friends, Morgan forgot something and went back into the house, while I waited by the car. Just then, two hats fell out of the sky. Then Morgan walked back out of the house and I asked her, “Where could these hats have come from, they just fell out of the sky?” Morgan smiled and said, “They are probably a sign from the Universe.” Then she showed me her cell phone, to show me that one of the friends we were on our way to meet for lunch, was on television, receiving an award – that friend was wearing a sparkling, rhinestone studded hat, something I don’t think she would ever wear, but here it was, on her head and she was smiling. I then said to Morgan, “If she is being filmed how will she be able to meet us for lunch?” Morgan just smiled and said, “Mom, it was probably filmed earlier and she will be there.”

It made me happy. It really felt like all was well in the world and I truly appreciated spending a little more time with Morgan…and that is exactly how I felt when I woke up.

Was it a dream? Was it a sign? Or did Morgan just pop into my dream to give me the best present I could have ever asked for…just a little more time to be with her.