Understanding the stalker, and the responsibilities of being a good parent, and a good human being

As the world grows it learns.  The FBI has begun to further understand the intricate nuances of stalkers and their multifaceted dangers.  Click here for a great article to read about predatory stalkers. 

Keenan Vanginkel stalked and escalated, as predicted that he would.  The lead detective assigned to Morgan’s felony stalking case knew the escalation was coming, and tried to warn us only two days before Morgan’s murder, at the same time he said he felt he was getting very close to making an arrest.  I do not think the detective knew what kind of escalation it would be, but he did say he felt it would escalate, and sadly for our daughter Morgan it was all too little, and too late.  She is now dead, and after the unspeakable travesties of Garfield County, Steve and I are stuck in a gut-wrenching, and never-ending rut of correcting those who should have been protecting Morgan, and her rights (before, and after her murder), but were not…

An afternoon in Santa Fe

An afternoon in Santa Fe

The last words of the detective, before Morgan was killed, was not only that her stalking was going to – “if anything it’s most likely going to escalate,” it was also that he wasn’t sure if Keenan’s girlfriend Brooke was not involved at all – OR, as he had begun to think more so lately, that she was very involved.  When your daughter is murdered somehow the who was more involved loses some of its fire.

So many lies have been uncovered that it is hard, really hard, not to point fingers at those who knew, and chose to pretend they did not.  Such as even the father of Brooke.  He confessed on the morning that Morgan’s body was found, to a client and certainly, by his own admissions,  knew enough to put a stop to it, but chose not to.  Instead he found it more important to protect his daughter.

There is a trend unraveling in Colorado these days, parents exposing the crimes and culpability of their children so others will not suffer.  It is an in-depth and complex idea.  Just the slightest word from a parent to law enforcement, that is willing to listen, has solved some of the shocking crimes that plague Colorado of late.  But you see there are two parts to the equation.  First there is a parent willing to give up the knowledge, and then there is law enforcement willing to listen. Here are some examples recently in Colorado:

1. His mother called 911 on Oct. 23, saying he wanted to confess to the Jessica Ridgeway Murder: Austin Sigg, teen suspect in slaying of 10-year-old Colo. girl Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013/04/12/colorado-teen-pleads-not-guilty-in-murder-10-year-old-girl/#ixzz2dt6rZTJR

2. In a plot to kidnap, beat a man and then dump him in the woods to starve, the parents of some of the boys that were plotting this crime turned over information about the alleged plot to the Eagle County Sheriff’s Office and Basalt Police Department. Read more: http://www.vaildaily.com/article/20120420/NEWS/120429983

In Morgan’s case there was neither.  On one hand the parent was, “just protecting his daughter,”  and on the other hand there were county officials that wanted to ignore what was, and had happened.  There was the Garfield County Sheriff Lou Vallario stating on camera for CBS Channel 4 that he would “never open this case.”  At least he knew it was a case.  And the contracted Forensic Pathologist was busily threatening me to stop having Morgan’s doctors, as well as other specialists tell him that she did not die of natural causes.  That at the very least (especially under the circumstances of felony stalking) Morgan’s case should have been written up as undetermined (open an investigation) or homicide (open an investigation).  Who threatens a mother to give up the quest for justice for their daughter?

The only thing that has changed is not where I end, but rather where I start.  You see I have never had to suffer the loss of a murdered daughter before.  And I have never been left with the task of trying to squeeze justice from those that just want us to just go away.  The unbelievable has unfolded within this blog many times.  I now think it is about to take a turn for Morgan.  And if anyone deserves a turn at justice, it is our daughter Morgan.  She cared, and loved, and wanted only to help others.  That much is without doubt.  She was also viciously murdered, and suffered through every attempt that Garfield County has done to hide that fact.

I so dearly wish I could share her smile with the world just one more time, but instead I will have to settle for letting everyone see what really happened to her. And hope that in so doing many more will be saved.  Stalking needs to be taken seriously by all offices of law enforcement (not just some), by all judges (not just some) and no more excuses, no more hidden agendas, we want transparency.  We miss you Morgan, but we will never give up the quest for justice.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Predatory Stalkers – hybrid killers of women?

shadowonroad

Here is a comment from a participant from a different country, on Morgan’s Stalking Facebook page, and in reply to the post about predatory stalkers.

“sadly in most education on stalking, sexual stalkers are often the category missed out as they are very rare in the sense of major stalking first, but extremely violent … Nearly always men, and nearly always have a violent ending…more needs to be done to tackle this issue. I have done a lot of research in all categories. They are almost always strangers and even if you knew them restraining orders rarely work. Different categories have different agendas and some will respond most won’t. The fact they can overlap on different categories also is a major problem for victims as their agenda and risk can often change. I was saddened to hear of this case. Just horrific. Stalking is horrific full stop and so common yet there is very little support or laws to combat it. Though it has gotten better over the years. More education, better laws and tougher sentences and above all, as this is something that can go on for years, more support and education for victims and their families.”

This is a comment that explains awareness so beautifully.  Had Steve, Morgan and I been aware of what was really lurking out there we would certainly have reacted differently, and Morgan would have been safer.  This is one of the reasons for the creation of this blog. We did not have the knowledge, or awareness about stalkers in the beginning when Morgan was being stalked, but I want to make sure others do. We must not be forced to live our lives in fear, so then we must live our lives with awareness.

Neighbors harbored, and aided this menace, unconscionable, but they did, they actually helped to hide him from the Sheriffs, spread incorrect information to people in order to  protect his presence.  Who does that to their neighbors? The Sheriffs treated him like a mere peeping tom, but he was a killer from the moment he first tapped on Morgan’s window.  Predatory stalkers are also most likely to lead double lives, leaving their friends & family stunned & disbelieving when they are caught. Paul E. Mullen, Michele Pathé and Rosemary Purcell: Predatory stalkers should almost always be managed within a sex-offender program.

Law enforcement agents & prosecutors need specialized training on identifying, investigating & prosecuting cases of stalking.  Predatory stalkers may stalk for a shorter period of time than other types of stalkers, and they are more likely to have prior criminal convictions – did the detective assigned to Morgan’s case have this knowledge?  He knew of the stalker’s criminal past.  Was he trained to know about the different types of stalking situations and how to react to them?

Predatory stalkers are a rarer type of stalker who doesn’t target intimate partners.  A predatory stalker is motivated by the thought of sexual gratification, and power over his victim.  For the predatory stalker, stalking is foreplay; the real goal is sexual assault.  How can the person that did this to Morgan still be able to roam free?  The Garfield County Sheriff’s never followed up after Morgan was murdered, they acted like they just wanted the whole thing to disappear…go away.  No case was completed, no arrest was made – the detective went from telling me he was 100% sure of who the stalker was 2 days before Morgan was murdered, to 5 months later telling me they never had a suspect (very strange considering I have emails, text messages, etc. where the detective names the suspect and says he is the suspect), and now that Morgan is gone there is no one left to stalk so the case is closed…are you kidding me?  No one left to stalk?  Do you think someone who did this to Morgan is never going to stalk and murder again after getting away with this?  I think not – but what do you think?  Experts on stalking say these type of stalkers never stop – so who will be next?  I get so upset when I think about this.  People say to Steve and I, “you guys are so strong to keep fighting for justice for Morgan” but the real reason isn’t because we are strong (we’re not), it’s because we have to keep fighting – if we don’t who will be next?  Which young woman like Morgan will have to suffer the same fate?  What family will suffer the rest of their lives with the same kind of pain that our family is suffering?  I can’t stand the thought, and neither can Steve so we have to keep fighting and we will until the day we die.

Predatory stalkers are a particularly dangerous breed – they are cold and calculating.  It is very frightening, and that fear is what stalkers want to create…they want to believe they can control you. We need to come up with good ways for people to take back that control, and get these predators in jail, that’s where I hope raising the awareness, and having other stalking victims come forward to tell their stories about their feelings, about what worked, and what didn’t work, and that will all help others in the long run.  Thank you all for helping to make the change is this world that needs to be seen.

 

Happy Birthday Morgan – we didn’t forget this would have been your 22nd birthday sweetheart!

Happy 22nd birthday Morgan…I know you can’t be here with us to celebrate this day – we were all so blessed that you came down to earth to become part of our family, and I do know you are all around us, and we also know that you know how much we all love you. Mom

We just found this recording that you did Morgan – the one of you and I when you were trying to get me to promise not to clean while you were going to be away for a while. I know you would get frustrated with me when I would clean the things you were planning on cleaning when you returned…I know you didn’t want me to be put out like that and when you were trying to get me to promise on tape we were both laughing so hard. I love hearing your voice on the recordings I found…it make me feel like I can still hear you.

Morgansbirthday hammock

Morgan lying on her birthday hammock (on her last birthday in August 2011).  We miss you Morgan more than words can express, we know you are in a beautiful place now, we feel you all around us, but it’s so hard not to squeeze your hand, or kiss your cheek.  Please know we are all thinking about you today and love you so very much
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Morgan’s best friend wrote to Morgan this morning: Oh Mamma Bear, this is the second birthday to pass without you. I miss you so much, not a day goes by that you do not come to my mind and heart. You are my soul twin, and I know we will meet again. Today is for you lovie  ps a dream birthday visit/ romp/ tea party would not be objected tonight
- FRIENDS -

– FRIENDS –

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And then Morgan’s Aunt & cousins sent her birthday wishes…Wishing Morgan a Happy Birthday!!!!! We love and miss you Auntie Ada, Jason , Lisa and little Clay

Picture taken in Steamboat Springs in August 2011 when we went with Morgan to visit during her Aunt & Uncle & cousin’s family reunion (we needed to get her away from the stalking that was keeping us all awake all night, and we all 3 really needed a good night’s sleep) – everyone brought their dogs we must have had at least 7 dogs all together, and everyone had so much fun, while Morgan ran around snapping pictures.Steamboatreunion

Morgan’s brother honors Morgan in his own way…

Our whole family has been devastated by the loss of Morgan…I don’t think I will ever have words strong enough to convey that feeling.  I wanted to share a moment in Morgan’s brother’s life that recently happened.

Ryan 1

Morgan’s brother made up his mind to get his first tattoo in order to honor his sister’s memory…He decided the quote Morgan wrote on some ribbon, and held in front of herself in some pictures she took, would be the perfect thing to always remind him, not only of her, but of one of the many strong beliefs they both shared.  Fate – The Illusion that you’ll get the things you want without earning them.  

They both believed in hard work, and dedication in order to achieve their goals.  Ryan said he is planning on going back in to have Morgan’s initials put under this tattoo.  It has been a year and a half since Morgan’s stalking started, and our once normal lives turned into the unthinkable – trying to protect our youngest daughter from a predatory stalker, and then 4 months later, in the midst of her felony stalking case, the shock and disbelief of finding her dead in her bed.

This unthinkable tragedy has been devastating to our entire family, but it has also taught us all to hold each other a little longer, always remember to end each conversation with, “I love you”, like Morgan always did, never take each other for granted, appreciate every second of our lives, believe in love being greater than hate, remember to lean on each other for strength, and remember that Morgan is still always with us – her light still shining bright.

Our family is strong, and will keep pushing forward in order to get justice for Morgan, and to give a voice to others that can not speak for themselves. Stalking is a pervasive and serious threat, and so many victims worry (and in some cases rightly so, as I have heard so many times from other stalking victims) that their complaints won’t be taken seriously.  David Beatty, the former director of public policy for the National Victim Center in Washington, DC said, “in almost every stalking case that turns violent the warning signs were already there.”

Let’s all remember to talk stalking seriously – open your minds, and hearts to victims of stalking, and help whenever you can.  Believe people when they are in distress, and tell you about what is happening to them.  Keep your eyes and ears open for anything strange or out-of-place when it comes to your children, or other people’s children – you might just be the difference in saving some other family from going through the heartbreak that our family has had to experience.  Good people in this world can make the greatest difference in bringing about the change that is desperately needed.  Thank you all for helping our family this past year and a half – when our strength starts to dwindle your support holds us up, and gets us going again…and for that I am forever grateful!

Please join me tonight…on a special radio show about stalking

Morganart copy

Good morning everyone – please join me tonight (8:00 pm Pacific, 9:00 pm Mountain, 10:00 pm Central & 11:00 pm EST) as I have the honor of being a guest on the following blog radio show.  I will be talking about our daughter Morgan’s stalking & murder, as well as things we can all do to raise awareness about stalking in order to see the change in this world that needs to be seen.  Stalking needs to be taken seriously, and the producers of this show also believe this is an important message for people to hear.  Thanks – I hope you can listen in – Toni

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/captivating-chats/2013/08/07/our-special-guest-toni–morgans-stalking

Raising Awareness On Stalking

  • Please join the ladies as they discuss the topic of stalking.  We have heard of celebrities being stalked, but are we aware this happens to everyday folks? 

It is an issue that is lurking underground, just as real stalkers do. We do not see it in our everyday lives.  It is very present whether we are aware of it, or not.  

We want to raise awareness and the issue of stalking.  The ladies welcome in Toni Ingram, she will be sharing her daughter’s story.

See you then,

Catherine and Patricia