Just what is your danger level ?

Morgan in the woods

What does it take to defend yourself?

Wouldn’t it be nice to know what it would take to defend your child in a suituation of danger?  It’s an answer many would like to know. as it is very telling in how more and more now,  I’m asked the same question – just how often are victims of stranger stalkers such as Morgan had – murdered by their stalker?  And I’ve never had a good answer for them.  And once again not to frighten everyone, but to raise awareness appropriately, it would be good to have a valid number based on research.  And to know what is an appropriate response to the dangers you suddenly face.

In our own situation, which is a small sample to be sure, Morgan was stalked by a stranger stalker and she was murdered, which I say because I don’t believe that on December 2, 2011, after four months of stalking, and right in the middle of everything set in motion that last week such as, formal interviews scheduled, Keenan’s work schedule for the last six months scheduled to be collected, Morgan going to be out-of-town for three days, the detective believing the stalking would escalate, deputies now suddenly coming by our house hourly during the wee hours of the morning and searching up on the roof, and a host of other facts. I just don’t believe someone else suddenly decided that was the right night to murder Morgan.  I believe it was her stalker, I’m just uncertain as to how much involvement his accomplice(s) had in her murder.

The government has few numbers that directly correlate, but they do have numbers that are very disturbing.  The first that jumps out at me is that:

“54% of female intimate partner homicide victims reported the stalking to the police before their stalkers killed them.”

I read that to mean if you have a stalker that used to be an intimate partner – after you report him to the police, 54% of the time you will be killed.  Do you think the 54% of women killed in this statistic were ever told just how dire their danger level was?  By the police they were reporting it to?  Because if they were not, I believe that should be almost criminal all by itself.

What if the very first time you were to call 911 or dispatch you were told this fact?  Frightening? Yes.  But informed and aware? That too.  Does anyone think that being ignorant of the danger and then murdered in that bliss is preferable to being frightened yet safer, because you were aware of the true dangers?  The informed and aware becomes a very key component to safety, a very important part.  Steve and I were not, absolutely not, ever apprised of any of the real dangers by the Sheriff’s department.  We were doing more that they had ever seen someone do, yet it was not enough to save Morgan, was it?

Make no mistake, the fight against stalking could easily be called a war.  When it’s drugs they use the term war.  You know the, “war on drugs.”  They have tanks here in Garfield, and task forces, and informants, and who knows what else.  But for stalkers, it would appear there is nothing beyond flashlights.  No clear-cut plan for attack, no booklet, no warnings about how to stop it.  That part is left completely up to us, unless you count the wildlife cams supplied by the Sheriffs with dead batteries.

What we need at the very least is a plan – that includes assistance from our local law enforcement.  And a really coordinated effort that is absolutely absent right now.

That brings me to the second statistic I saw over and over again:

“76% of Femicide victims had been stalked by the person who killed them.”

Femicide was a word that I didn’t know, and the definitions vary, “the killing of women,” is in most definitions, but then they begin to vary widely.  One definition even includes, “with impunity,” which I found to be particularly upsetting.

I do try to be positive, and not the harbinger of disaster, but it’s so easy to think that only some parts of the world suffer Femicide, and we in America certainly do not.  Well I could easily make the statement that Morgan was a victim of Femicide, and it would be true.  I could also add the upsetting “with impunity” statement contained in some definitions and I would also be correct.  That is a very sad state of affairs for women in this state.

The rest of the statistic spells out – “stalked by the person who killed them.”

So 76% of women murdered as part of any retaliation, or part of a group such as stalking victims had been stalked by the person who killed them.  And as Steve is quick to point out that the 76% is probably only cases that were solved.  In Morgan’s case she would not have been killed by her stalker because there was never a case, never charges filed, and never a trial . . . yet.

I hate how this works out after having been there and pulling answers from locked jaws for over a year.  First the Sheriff’s botch the investigation, not my opinion, that’s what I am told it was, no law against incompetence and all that.  Then they come to our house and, basically, no actually,  it seems that they do their best to destroy the crime scene of our daughter’s murder.  And remember we don’t know if it is actually a crime scene or not and will not for weeks.  So the day Morgan was found would have been really premature to destroy the crime scene.  Nobody really knew if she was murdered or not on that day.  Not Law Enforcement, not the Forensic Pathologist, and certainly not us, but since it was what they called “suspicious circumstances” it should have been treated as a homicide until proven otherwise.

Then they, the Coroner and Sheriff of Garfield, one by one, close all investigations down.  Never saw a stalker, suggesting maybe there was not one?  Morgan’s dead, no one to stalk anymore, stalking happened, but now no need to follow-up on any leads.  And at the end of all these excuses sits the next young woman who will now be all on her own, just as Morgan was all on her own, with only help from her parents.  And if it was not enough for Morgan, I doubt if the help from the next young woman’s parents is going to be enough either.  More of an unfortunate prelude to the next unreported case of Femicide in Garfield County than anything else.

I know it sounds serious when I put it that way but it is serious, very serious – our daughter is dead.  I just dashed off an eight page letter full of questions that need desperately to be answered and have not as of yet.  Steve proofed it for me and said, “this is going on truth for Morgan,” and it will, I’ll reference it back to this very post.

And I have decided something, statistics are only a necessary evil, short enough to convey the situation in sound bite fashion, but so utterly shocking in the underlying information they summarize.

I want a meaningful set of statistics, one that tells the true story of a stalker, all of the different ones somehow.  One who is also a peeping tom, who is also a trophy hunter, who was also the acknowledged class bully from kindergarten on, who was sheltered and protected by no less than three people on our quiet street in the middle of Colorado as he stalked our daughter.

I want the statistic that says this combination, if not stopped, is lethal and explosive.  And I want that for the next young woman, so she knows what she is up against and how to react to save her life so she doesn’t have to end up as Morgan did.  And unless you are one of those that agrees with the Garfield County notion that nothing happened here, I hope you do the same with your child.  Really, even if you do agree with Garfield County, err on the safe side and take it very seriously if anything remotely similar were to ever happen to your child.

I feel that it is much easier to back off from reacting to nothing that to suffer the consequence of not enough reaction to something…be it your little child, or your 20-year-old daughter, you want the best, and they deserve the best – from every single person involved.

The Path Less Traveled

Happy Morgan

Hard to remember a time she wasn’t smiling!

In reality this is even more of a seldom traveled path.  On one fork of the trail is that which you know, solid concrete facts and feelings, the comfort that comes from the familiar and knowing where it is going, and what will be at the end.  The other fork is unknown, ever evolving, constantly changing, shocking realizations and the wish for it to come to an end, which, as I am reminded every day, will happen not on my timetable, but rather on its own.  That fork is where I find my life going now – between my job, which I love, and the time I carve out for my family, which I love even more – is this mythical path meant to gain closure for an event in life that should never have even happened.

Such is Morgan’s stalking.  We know she had a stalker, more than one – no doubt.  He was on our porch, in our driveway, left footprints in the planters surrounding the house, he was up on the roof, leaning out and bending steel gutters until one side was torn in two.  He left well traveled trails, worn into the berm 75 feet behind our house, a constant reminder of his presence, even when he was right there, ready to terrorize, and also showing just how often he was actually there.  Seldom seen, but all too often there – waiting for Morgan, waiting for his next chance.

He was not afraid at all, security cameras caught him leaning against Steve’s truck to watch the deputies drive away after yet another fruitless attempt to catch him.  Another deputy, weeks earlier, had demonstrated for me very graphically, that standing in the deep scuff marks he left in the ground outside Morgan’s window, how his face would have been right up against the glass.  His nose just a whisper away as he stared at a defenseless nineteen year old girl at that time.  My back still quivers at the thought.

That was real – far too real.

Along the path less traveled are the actions of the Sheriff.  What do they mean?  If all that was happening to Morgan, and our family, on an almost daily basis and it would be called only misdemeanor trespassing for the first 58 days, doesn’t that mean they don’t take it seriously?  Didn’t their actions scream that they were just waiting for him to give up, and move on – with no meaningful intervention from the Sheriff’s department?  As perhaps this very same tormentor had done to so many other neighbors over the past four years.  Because it certainly seemed like this was the same person that had been spotted peering and tapping on a window of one neighbor, then also spotted in the fenced yard of another, seen staring into a woman’s master bedroom as she changed to go to sleep, and on and on.  Only this time he did not stop, not after a few days, and not after winter came.  One of our Sheriff’s Deputies in the beginning of Morgan’s stalking suggested that he was a “seasonal stalker” and last time he stopped as soon as it became cold or the snow started to fall.  It was as if he knew him personally, a seasonal criminal who will stop soon as it gets cold.  Where does that coexist with meaningful intervention?

A woman tormented by a man of the same description only two weeks before Morgan’s stalking began insisted that the Sheriffs follow-up on her incident, but they did not.  Doesn’t this show they do not care. Never mind it is not a high priority – doesn’t it appear to be a no priority at all?

It also was not reported by the Sheriffs.  A journalist researching Morgan’s stalking and seeking records was first told by the Sheriff’s department that he needed the exact day and address or he could not get any records.  When I got permission to pass that information along and did, he was then told there was no record, ever.  No record of an incident that was reported (Sheriff’s Deputies were at her house) with peeping tom, harassment, and trespassing written all over it.  What does that say about the Sheriff’s department?  About their stand on violence against women?  Because all of these victims before Morgan were women too.

Invasion of privacy for sexual gratification, harassment, eavesdropping, and felony stalking which comes after it’s happened more that once, and it causes you to suffer serious emotional distress.  Serious crimes if you are the victim, the recipient of all this very horrific, uninvited, completely unwanted terror.  Morgan had all of these crimes committed against her during her stalking.  I’m feeling they were also committed against our family as well, and as I read and re-read through the official reports, I have yet to find any of it documented.  Not once!  I was told to document everything, and you can bet that I did.  But then why do the police reports document nothing?  Do they not consider it a crime?

If the paperwork AKA the reports are what convicts the criminal in the end, then what does it mean when there are no reports?  A very helpful FBI Special Agent told me that he could not get involved in Morgan’s investigation, but I had to realize that there was no law against incompetence.  Does that mean he thought the Sheriff’s department was incompetent?  What about when the Honorable DA said that the Sheriff’s Department had so thoroughly botched the investigation that she did not know if there could ever be a prosecution?  What exactly were they doing when the first two independent assessments of their actions as law enforcement professionals are so completely dismal?

When your attempt at intervention is not producing results, and the crime is continuing, escalating, shouldn’t someone step up and say, “this is not working, we have to do better.”  If you care about stopping crime, and protecting victims do you blindly do the same thing day in and day out with no tangible results, and somehow call it a job well done?

Steve and I constantly told each other, “this is not working, we have to do better!”

We bought wildlife cameras, motion detectors, installed more and more motion lights, surveillance video cameras, Steve sat out on the berm behind our house, dressed all in black, for hours at a time.  And none of it was enough for more than a glimpse of him.  The reality, when he lives three houses up the street, is that he can watch and wait and assess, then attack when the “coast is clear.”  He could sit up on our roof in a spot perfectly made to conceal a criminal, such as we had.  Or he could stand and see Sheriffs trucks approaching from far away.  Any thought the Sheriffs ever had concerning any element of surprise working for them was nothing more than a fleeting dream.

Then Morgan, the victim in every sense of the word, of all the continuing crimes, that did nothing but escalate – is murdered, horrifically murdered in her own bedroom, the murder scene complete with so many obvious signs of an intruder being present.  More promises of the how they had collected everything they needed.  There was talk of new detectives, just for her death – once again, all the promises of all the things that would never happen.  Was it because she was a woman?  I have to wonder aloud.  And we kept trusting the Sheriffs – we still believed they were telling us the truth.

While we are constantly reminded by those who have lent their help – Steve and I are not trained investigators, nor are we accomplished hunters, not a legal team, not doctors and not forensic pathologists.  We do understand as it is explained to us, and believe me – understanding what has been, and is being explained to us is not pleasant.

 Unfortunately, all the times we returned to Garfield County with new knowledge to share from a fact-finding trip, we would hear that everything explained to us meant nothing here in Garfield County.  Their mind was made up, no more Morgan, no more stalking.  How can a real Sheriff’s Department ever say that?  Then there was the Coroner, claiming her death is in no way connected to her stalking, it’s natural causes, from a blood disease she never had, and the condition of her lungs indicated strangulation before anything benign.

We wanted natural causes changed because we were told over and over by the best experts we are able to seek out that this is anything but natural causes.  Who wouldn’t?  Those pursuits resulted in threats that her death would be revisited, perhaps changed.  What forensic pathologist does that?  In this country is that even legal?  But the threats registered with us.  We documented them with the Sheriffs and with the Coroner, who was responsible for contracting this forensic pathologist.

I talked extensively with another forensic pathologist that was gracious enough to take time from his busy schedule to intervene and explain the mistakes to our Coroner, he also assured me the manner of death could never be changed to a suicide for many more reasons that I won’t go into right now.  Does this mean he thought the original forensic pathologist would never stoop so low?  Or be absolutely so cavalier with the facts?  Talking about the original forensic pathologist that was a doctor, not an M.D., but some sort of doctor.  It was crippling to me when Morgan was changed to a suicide, such an unbelievable insult for a young woman like Morgan.  The way the system works in Colorado means our legal avenues to have this horrific wrong righted will take many, many years.  Does this sound like justice to you?  When we were threatened, reported the threats, and a man contracted by the County Coroner then followed through on his threats, with never any concern for the truth – shocking!  Absolutely shocking!  Has he been placed in a position that he is completely above the law?  The path Steve and I will travel to right just the wrongs we are aware of now is the less traveled choice.  Morgan was such a bright light in our lives and such a loving daughter I don’t believe any parent put in our position would want to do any less than we shall.  That is our job, to tell the story, and how we believe it could have ended very differently.

I don’t want anyone in this world to ever have to sit where I sit and to ever have to look back on what I am seeing, and being forced to relive everyday.  It is simply impossible to react correctly as such crimes are coming at you, rapid fire, all happening in real-time, completely disrupting your life in an unyielding march to an end that hasn’t quite happened yet, so you have only your hopes, but no real idea what the ending will be, then as swiftly as it began it is over, and it ends up to be so horrifying that it is hard to believe, to process, to pick up the pieces and move again.  That was our reality – now how do we change it? That  is our future path – not just Steve, and I, and all of my loving family, but all of us who inhabit this world…

An interview with Toni & Steve Ingram about Morgan’s #stalking & #murder

Morganart copy

We recently had an interview with Travanti Jaramillo @GFTPOD – we appreciate his interest in the case, and allowing us a voice.  Please click on the link below, and listen to the complete interview – I know it’s long, but we would appreciate any comments.

Thank you so much Travanti.

http://gofromthere.podbean.com/2013/06/21/144-steve-toni-ingram-morgans-stalking/

Catching a #Stalker – It’s not Impossible…

Fireandmorgan

Starting out with a stranger stalker, also called an unknown stalker, this is a stalker with no relationship history, it is one of the most dangerous – the kind of Stalker Morgan had.  It was a chance meeting at some very unfortunate moment in Morgan’s life.  He could have just seen her from a distance once, but that is not what we believe happened.

Just like the pool of suspects that Morgan, Steve and I started looking at during the stalking, I started with a list of possibilities of where he met her, suspected chance meetings where Keenan could have seen Morgan, tried to, or imagined he tried to talk to her, as that is all it takes to start a deadly spiral to the end such as this story is.

My possibilities go like this:

  • Morgan shopped at the City Market in El Jebel, Keenan worked at the City Market in El Jebel too.  His official title does not include cash register duty (I have seen with my own eyes), but he did do that enough to have met Morgan more than once at his register standing in his check-out line.  Morgan would have paid with a credit card, he could have asked to see her license, this could have happened many times before he moved in to the neighborhood in June or July of 2011, even Keenan is not quite sure when he did move in.  Just that we know it was right before the daily stalking began.
  • Another possibility is the ranch behind the house.  By the time Keenan moved into the neighborhood his girlfriend was Brooke.  Brooke’s mother Christine worked at the ranch, Keenan’s sister volunteered to help with the therapy horses.  Elliott was there with his daughters, and I did try to ask him if he ever saw Keenan there, but ever since he moved out, right after Morgan’s murder, it’s been hard to get hold of him.  Morgan was at the ranch infrequently, and passed by a few times a day at least, so he certainly could have seen her there.
  • One documented meeting was at Morgan’s friend’s house.  After a stay at a drug rehab facility Brooke had been living with that family (Morgan’s friend’s family) instead of at her home with her parents.  While Morgan was there one afternoon Brooke showed up with Keenan, and Morgan was so “absolutely creeped out by this guy who was with Brooke,” that she left without speaking a word.  Morgan told me, Steve, Deputies, and Detectives about this meeting many times.  What was not known until later, after Morgan was already dead, was that this was one of the times when Brooke, behind Morgan’s back, but talking about Morgan, said “that bitch is going to get it someday.”  This particular threat by Brooke was just days before the car Morgan and I shared was vandalized, with “Bitch” scraped down to the metal on the driver’s door while parked at the college where Morgan was taking a night class (this was just blocks from the house Brooke was living in).  Repairs were well into the thousands, and Keenan would later say to a detective that this was “Brooke’s style.”  But was this ever looked in to?  NO.

There may well have been other incidental meetings, but they were never recalled and hence never explored while Morgan was still alive.  A common component from a psychological point of view is the stalker manifesting anger, and hostility towards the victim, this often stems from perceived rejection of the stalker by the victim, it could also be actual rejection, but I do not believe this to be the case as Keenan never made an approach toward Morgan that she could remember.  She did not remember him ever actually speaking to her except for the things he had to say at the grocery store.  An important part of rejection, even perceived rejection would be a conversation, real or imagined.

If the victim of a stranger stalker can identify the meetings with strangers that could be a stalker, it is the beginning of a list of suspects.  The unique characteristics of the stalking is another source of suspects.  In Morgan’s stalking the arrival of her stalker within minutes of her arrival home was a very big component.  Every neighbor was made a suspect at the beginning so as not to miss anyone, and many fell off very quickly.  The unexpected wildlife camera images whittled the suspect list down to four, which was real progress.

The success of the wildlife cam was due to two things. It was brand new, hung just before darkness one afternoon, so the element of surprise.  And the stalker was distracted.  Of course he is trying to look as nonchalant as he can in the picture, but there was some amount of focus on the departing Sheriff’s Deputies.  The trigger time for that camera was rated at five seconds, only in practice as much as eight seconds could elapse before an image was taken.  Going by the time imprinted on the images the actual interval was between a little more than one minute, up to a little less than three.  When taking a picture the camera lit up with a red glow first and then the picture was taken.

There were three deputies there crisscrossing the yard.  Was this stalker on the roof, just watching them, then dropping down as they went for their trucks?  Better than all three missing as he hid in plain sight.  Recreating the incident as if he were on the roof, it takes 12 seconds to come down off the roof and walk casually to the front of Steve’s truck.  5 – 8 seconds for the camera to click his picture.  Within thirty to forty seconds after they walked down the drive, he was at the hood of Steve’s truck.  The attempts to knock the camera down came right after that.  He knows he has been recorded on camera.  In the following days, his hair goes from blonde to black and during interviews he admits that he may have come in the driveway because he saw something of interest.  More attention has to be paid to the details, the #1 suspect never gets a free pass to be in the driveway (and this was not at the end of our driveway it was close to the front door where our cars were parked) watching the Sheriffs Deputies leave.  And keep track of his hair color.  See the wildlife cam images here

I believe after the incident he went back up on the roof.  From there he can see the surrounding streets and highways for miles in all directions.  He can see the Sheriffs drive away and be certain not one deputy, “hung around,” as they sometimes did from a block or two away to see if a lone figure wanders to another house in the subdivision.

He was one step ahead of the Deputies at all times.  Why did they not bring in the dogs?  That night they had a picture of him, knew exactly where he was standing so the dogs could get his scent, then put their nose to the ground and track back to a house where he went, or a tree he had used to scale back up on the roof.  Either way he was one step closer to being caught if they had employed the dogs.  Instead they drove away, angered at how he was, “thumbing his nose at them.”  Mark Wynn’s (an expert on matters of stalkers, and stalking) this is an assessment that indicates a dangerous stalker, one to be taken very seriously.  The Deputies got angry the stalker was cavalier to their presence and left, Morgan was killed three months later.  Somewhere priorities, and pride got a little too jumbled in our daughter’s case.  Pay careful attention to the attitude of you protectors and always ask yourself – are they doing all they can?  Do they really care?  Or am I getting lip service, and not much more?

But in the wee hours of the morning that day we had a blurred image, we knew his height, could guess at weight, if male or female, his build, and more.  A list of suspects shrank to four.  All because something unexpected had happened!  How many times had he done that exact thing before?  Only this one night there was a camera.

Do unexpected things, change-up what you are doing constantly, and never talk about it in your home.  While he was standing at Morgan’s windows, or a few feet back, to watch her, it is fantasy to think he did not hear all of the conversations in the house – which usually included our future plans to catch him.

The unknown and unexpected, are your tools to use as you wish.  Running out the door with a bat is not the weapon you think it is – I know we tried.  I would suggest this only if you have trip lines at strategic locations.  They did not work for us, but they may for you.  Every stalker is different, possessing different skills, and physical abilities.

Another tool is a random event along with your deterrence already in place. When we had security video covering the drive he was crouched behind the car Morgan and I shared.  One might ask why, Steve did immediately.  Not one Deputy, and not one Detective said, “I wonder what he was doing back there?”  Pay attention to lapses such as that.  Knowing the capabilities of your defenders is not a slight it’s in your best interest.

So while he was crouched behind the car, doing whatever he was doing back there, a neighbor suddenly starts driving up the street.  If he sits behind the car he will be exposed, so he stands and runs for the trees of the front yard.  That part works, the neighbor had no idea all this happened as he came up the street.  But the stalker was again on a clip of video, because something unexpected happened.  The cameras he knew were there, that a car would come up the street right at the same time he did not.

Do not allow ridiculous answers to slide by, ever.  Morgan’s stalker told the detectives he might have been in our driveway.  I believe Brooke did too.  Now what, do they just get a free pass?  The #1 suspect should never be allowed in the driveway for any reason.  Stalkers go up your driveway to stalk the victims in the house, no other reason.

And really?  Is it possible that you were ever in your neighbor down the streets driveway, crouched behind his car, dressed in clothes to conceal yourself, in pitch blackness, and it’s possible you don’t remember?  The girlfriend too?  That they were let off with answers like that, “I might have.”  Is just poor investigation.

Morgan’s stalker, in a conversation on facebook, says:

November 6, 2011, 9:26am, Keenan James Vanginkel says:

 “Idk why you are giving me so much trouble cuz I have done nothing wrong. For everything u are accusing me of I will have a story for and multiple people to prove that I wasn’t there. But if u don’t stop right now I will press charges against you.”

Notice – “everything u are accusing me of I WILL have a story for and multiple people to prove that I wasn’t there.”

So he knows there is a stalking, no questions about that.  And he WILL have an alibi for everything, his own story and multiple others.  Isn’t that all too convenient for him?  At least he admits there is a stalking, James Harris claimed he didn’t even know, AFTER the Deputies talked to him about the stalking, the Detectives questioned his daughter about the stalking.  He talked to the Detectives about the stalking, about how he heard Morgan’s parents were overreacting.  My daughter is dead – and I think he knows more than he is saying, don’t you?  I obviously did not react enough!

Set up your defenses so there are always two different things to contend with for the stalker.  One thing at a time is easy, but look at Morgan’s stalker, video surveillance, easy to hide behind car, but a neighbor coming home from work, and he’s caught on film again.

There was a surprise snowstorm, and footprints all the way from Brooke’s house and to the corner where they climbed the tree were revealed.  Steve photographed it all (while walking and observing the prints with the Deputy) and drew a map for the Deputy.  That our map given to the Deputy was never entered it into evidence is an incentive for you to check the evidence often.  Perhaps weekly with your Detective, so you know it’s all in there instead of, gee wonder what happened to that one?

Two tools – the unknown and the unexpected.  Keeping your stalker off guard can be counted on to anger him, but then you will also get shots at him.  The night Morgan’s stalker was caught on the wildlife camera Steve took it down to check the chip, in yet another unexpected act.  Actually I asked Steve after the Deputies left, even though he was tired, and it was so late, just to see how it works – I was sure it would have picked up the Deputies leaving the house.  He had work the next day, he was exhausted, but he did it.

Morgan’s stalker came by the house seven more times that night to set off our alarms on the rear of the house after the Deputies left to otherwise make his presence known as if to say ha ha didn’t catch me.  A simple display of anger and/or “I can’t be caught.”  For all the times the Sheriffs promised the dogs, if they were ever going to do it that would have been the night.  But they did not.  You have to count on yourself, and wouldn’t it be even better if we all counted on each other – to help out?

From Morgan to her Dad on a Father’s Day long ago…Happy Father’s Day to all the other Dad’s out there!

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