Morgan and her big sister at her sister’s wedding

Last week a convicted murderer entered the sentencing phase.  As a part of that sentencing family members are allowed to speak.  In fact victims of a crime are given a large latitude on their statements to the Judge and jury about how the crime has impacted them personally.

Travis Alexander is not as well known a name as Jodi Arias, he was the man that she stands convicted of killing.  Even less known is that Travis has a brother who did speak about how this tragedy has affected him.  Steven Alexander described for the judge and jury about the emotional and physical toll that he has suffered since the loss of his brother Travis when Travis was murdered back in 2008.  It has been almost five years, and to hear him talk it was just yesterday – except a lot has happened over the years.  He described ulcers, his separation from his wife, and how he has repeated nightmares that he dearly wishes he could stop.

Steven Alexander is a victim, and to hear his words helps to put a face on all the victims of crime, and the need for stronger victims rights in this country.  If existing state laws are placed under a federal umbrella they become stronger.  And they well need to be.  The federal version will come as a constitutional amendment – the first in over 20 years if successful.  It will be a momentous occasion to be sure.

To have heard about Steven and his sad ordeal since his brother’s murder helps to better understand a similar situation within Morgan’s death.  Not yet ruled a murder, because as of yet there has not been a charge filed, but even so the curse that is the life of a victim of crime lives on,  Morgan’s brother has been suffering through his own ordeal, which is very much like the brother of Travis Alexander.

He left his almost life long home here in the Roaring Fork Valley, because he could not bear to live in the place his sister had been killed.  Emotional and physical issues that do not usually belong to a healthy, and active young man in his early thirties have become all too real a part of his life.  He loved his younger sister very much, as did Morgan’s older sister.  Beside Morgan’s brother and sister, Morgan also had a cousin who was more like a sister to her, because she lived with us off and on while growing up.  She was older than Morgan’s brother and younger than Morgan’s sister.  All three girls called Steve daddy, even when they were older, the two older now in their 30’s, Morgan’s brother on the other hand called him dad – much more of a male thing I guess.  I was always called mom, and in my nieces case, she called me Aunt Toni – she called Steve daddy all these years because she never really knew her dad, he left her when she was a baby and Steve treated her as though she was his daughter, she needed a dad for the projects you make in school on father’s day, etc. and Steve very gladly volunteered, and she loved him for that.  We are a very close family, we  love each other very much, and it is very disturbing (even though it shouldn’t matter) when I hear other people say things about us when they don’t even know us.  Do they think to ask Morgan’s close friends (not people that say they were her friends, but her real friends), do they think to ask other kids that we took in to our home over the years, and actually lived with us, and interacted with us?

No they never did, because if they had they would all know that for Morgan to use the words, “I love you, and good night daddy” whenever she said good night to him (like she did the last night of her life) was totally normal – it was what she said every night of her life when she was home, even if she had friends over (it never embarrassed her).  But do these people actually question?  No – they just think they know it all – they think what they hear from strangers is the truth…just like the Sheriff’s Department, did they ever interview Morgan’s close friends, or teachers, or classmates, or the woman she worked part time for?  The answer is no.  If they had they would have known that she had told people that were close to her about her stalker, who he was, and what was going on.  The felony stalking detective assigned to her case spoke with her on an almost weekly basis, and knew what was going on, but Morgan had given up on the Sheriff’s helping her.  I was the one that kept trying to tell her they were getting close to making an arrest, I was the one that blindly believed in them, and believed in what they were telling me.  Morgan was much better at seeing through all the false promises.  Morgan did want her brother to intercede (I was the one that asked him not to), Morgan did want her friends from Aspen to come do stake-outs, and teach this stalker a lesson (as they were biting at the bit to do), but I told her that wasn’t the way to deal with this.

I know now I was wrong, and for Morgan my decision was deadly wrong.  Morgan herself was so angry one day, when she arrived home from school, because she had just endured Keenan staring her down at the same intersection, at the same time she was coming down the hill from school – she had told the detective about this many times, and instead of doing something about it the detective made up excuses that maybe Keenan’s father lived there (he admitted to me months after Morgan was killed that he had no real idea where Keenan or his Father lived, so he just lied to us?) or maybe the car just looked like Keenan’s, but really wasn’t – how dare he try to minimize Morgan’s stalking, and how dare we let him!

Morgan saw Keenan in the car, and identified him – what do stalking victims have to do to get help?  That day she could take it no more, Morgan grabbed a baseball bat when she arrived home from school after another stare down at the intersection, and told me she was going to drive around until she found Keenan, but I told her that was too dangerous, she would not take no for an answer so I followed her out to the car and I went with her to try to keep her safe.  Is this what law enforcement wants victims to do?  Because this is exactly what they forced Morgan to do, to feel she had to take the law into her own hands.  Morgan was angry, and frustrated, not depressed.  Morgan was a strong and amazing young woman that never felt like she needed to rely on others, but her stalker caused her serious emotional distress.

The Detectives called Morgan’s case a “textbook felony stalking”, and were 100% certain who her stalker was.  Morgan saw her stalker in stare downs. And Morgan was a take-charge type of person, but trying to do what law enforcement wanted her to do which was pretty much amounted to just keep a log, and tell them when anything happened, so they could come by after-the-fact, a half hour later usually, and search the grounds.  We all know the protocol failed and ended up costing Morgan her life – and that has to change!

There are so many people that have been impacted by Morgan’s death – people that I have never met, across the country and throughout the world.  Stalking extracts an enormous toll.  For example just recently, after all this time, I have spoken with one person in particular who is the Aunt of Morgan’s friend…the friend she was with her last afternoon on earth.  I know Morgan was very intuitive, and probably had a bad feeling about sleeping at home that night, so when her friend’s Aunt came home from work she asked if she could sleep over her house on her couch – I did not know this until just a few months ago.  Her friend’s Aunt told me the story over the phone, while crying and telling me she felt responsible, because she told Morgan that she was exhausted from a trying day and had a bad headache and didn’t want anyone sleeping over that night.

The “feeling” Morgan had was most likely the reason she snapped at me when she came home that night.  I was waiting for her in the driveway as usual with pepper spray in hand and started to lecture her as she got out of the car because between 4 – 6 pm that day I was unable to reach her by phone or text message, and I was really scared that something might have happened to her.  This was so absolutely NOT a fight like other people have tried to portray.  What parent in this situation would not be frightened, and not say anything, and what young adult would not at least snap back a word in response when they are feeling upset, and nervous about their situation?

You see stalking turns all the tensions to high, and the victims are somehow expected to go on as if nothing is happening.  Not so easy.  People are raised differently – they have different life experiences, and no you can not know what someone says or does not say to their parents when they go to bed at night unless you ask…don’t assume you know, because most likely you will be wrong.  Steve told the Detective that Morgan  was “just Morgan” when he saw her for the last time, “completely normal”, but tired.

We were blessed – all our children, nieces and nephews ALWAYS tell us how much they love us whenever they talk to us, and we tell them.  I believe you should tell the ones you love on a daily basis how much they mean to you – what if you never get another chance?  Until Morgan died I never really thought about that – we just all care about each other, and we were all raised to show our love to one another…for this I feel very blessed.

The stalker who terrorized Morgan walks free as if there was never even a stalking.  And Morgan’s killer at present is leading his normal life after the Sheriff proclaimed that he would never open this case.  Just look back in all of the murders in Garfield County for the last five years for another murder where the Sheriff did open the case, you will not find very many.  And please don’t tell me that is because it is a small County and that’s what happens in small Counties…they don’t have the manpower, they don’t have the budget.  We are talking about human life, and criminals here…excuses don’t cut it.  Where there is a challenge, find a solution!

And as life quickly returned to normal for most – Morgan’s brother has fallen to the ills that so many other victims face when a family member is killed.  It is also why victim’s rights laws have been placed in the revised statutes of most every state.  Because the family members were easy targets for the perps family and friends.  A disgusting loophole that the states have individually started to close, and a pending Federal Constitutional Amendment will unify protection, and take the matter a large step further.

Do not allow this problem to be minimized, If it were not such a problem there would not be such effort to close the doors through litigation.  A constitutional amendment to the United States Constitution should speak volumes to the magnitude of the problem.  And believe me, after all of the threats I have received, either naming directly or sometimes traced back to the family, and friends of Keenan and Brooke, it is another of those things I could never have imagined.