My Mother’s Day Wish Today…

For all mothers who have lost a child, I know your pain and heartache never ceases, but my hope for all of us is that the love we have for our child is greater than the pain of our loss.

Normal was destroyed the moment we knew our child was gone, and that normal will never return, but the courage we show, every day, just taking a breath and trying our hardest to carry on, is what I call real courage.

Please be gentle with yourself on this day…may your smile still come through when remembering your precious child, even though the tears will also come.

May you always see your child’s smile in your mind’s eye and feel the warmth of their love, because death can never take that away from us…death can never sever the cord between a mother and her child – remember that always.

 

I Miss You Morgan…Happy Valentine’s Day in Heaven

I miss you so much Morgan…I smiled this morning remembering how happy you were when I bought you the frog prince key chain for Valentine’s Day. I wish with all my heart I could give you another present today on Valentine’s Day. I will close my eyes and talk to you about all the little “hearts” you always put everywhere.

Thank you so much for always telling everyone how much you loved them…at the end of every phone call, every time you said goodbye, an every time you had an opportunity, you always told people how you felt, and that my dear daughter was something very unique and precious that I will always keep in my heart when I think of you.

Someone said grief has 3 stages:

  • First stage is the beginning
  • Second stage is the middle
  • Third stage is FOREVER

There is no “getting over” grief there is only learning to live with it and on days like today it hurts a little worse than normal. Miss you baby!

Mom (Your Motina)

Morgan – You were supposed to be here…

My sweet youngest daughter, you were supposed to be here to see and enjoy your big sister’s first baby. Your sister really wished she had you with her to help and share in all her “first” moments with her new little one.

You were supposed to be here for your older brother’s third baby, Steven. This little one is always smiling, just like you, and even has your beautiful blue eyes and the same hair color as you.

You were supposed to be here to enjoy your niece’s 11-year-old birthday party and your 9-year-old nephew’s celebration. All our family’s happy moments are bittersweet because you were not here to enjoy them with us – it always feels like something is missing…you 🙁

You were supposed to have your own engagement, wedding and first born. But a “stalker” stole that away from you, and us, when he took your life. We miss you every day. You’re never far from our thoughts, and will always be in our hearts…forever!

Rest in heaven my sweet baby girl.
8/16/1991 – 12/2/2011

#JusticeforMorgan

JUSTICE FOR MORGAN…

This poster is one that a supporter made for Morgan…this supporter has also lost her sister to murder, in Colorado, a staged crime scene just like Morgan’s with no investigation and her listed manner of death was also “suicide,” when the evidence actually supports murder. What is up with Colorado? Why don’t they let the evidence lead them to the true cause and manner of death? Why do they continue to ignore the evidence? #JusticeForMorgan #JusticeforHolly

Painful & Happy Tears…

Morgan loved her keyboard and played it almost every day, from the moment she acquired it. Listening to her play her music and sing was always the highlight of my day. After Morgan died we packed her keyboard away…all these years it never again would play her beautiful music. We left it in storage, along with so many more things of Morgan’s. Last week our son Ryan unpacked Morgan’s keyboard.

Steve & I had finally taken Morgan’s keyboard out of storage, and we gave it to Ryan for our grandchildren to use. It was hard, but I knew Morgan was happy we did it. We realized that it wasn’t right that it was hidden away in storage all these years and never used. Our little 8-year-old grandson had recently gone to his great grandparent’s house, and without any training, he started playing their piano…when I heard this, I just knew our grandchildren needed Morgan’s keyboard. They used to call Morgan their Aunt Gigi, and now they have Gigi’s keyboard to continue playing beautiful music. Boy, does this planet need more music or what? I think so…

Anyway, Ryan unpacked the keyboard the other night and set it up – they sent us a text and said as soon as it was unpacked they all started crying. Yes, Morgan’s death still hurts everyone, not just us, her parents, but so many others all these years later.

Getting justice for Morgan won’t bring her back, and it won’t give anyone closure, BUT we still fight and wait for the knowledge and peace that comes when justice is served.

#JusticeForMorgan