A Little Angel in the Snow…

Morgan and AngelMorgan with her sweet little ferret that she named Angel.  Angel appeared to us one night as we were driving out of our garage on our way to Morgan’s brother’s hockey game.  I remember it was dark and cold outside. It was snowing lightly and as Steve backed out of the garage we noticed movement caught by the light from our car’s headlights. We couldn’t decide what it was, but it certainly looked like a little animal in distress, as it was being chased by a cat.  I immediately asked Steve to stop the car, I jumped out and went towards the front of the car to see if it was still there.  It certainly was, and as soon as it saw me it ran towards me.  I could see it was a little creature, but I wasn’t sure what it was.  It seemed to want me to pick it up, it kept trying to jump up my leg so I started to walk in circles not knowing what to do.  All of a sudden Morgan opened up the back door of the car, stepped out, bent over and picked up the little creature.  She cradled it in her arms like a baby and it snuggled into her.  I was shocked…I didn’t know if it was wild or not.  I didn’t know if I should be worried that it might bite her, but she was instantly convinced that it was sweet and gentle, and just wanted to be cared for.

Morgan insisted on putting the little ferret (she informed me it was a ferret) into our heated garage, and we all continued on to the hockey game.  When we returned home our first concern was what to feed the little ferret.  The next thought was to make fliers to post in the neighborhood to see if someone was missing this adorable little creature.  He was very tame and Morgan was in love with him.  He slept in her room with her.  The posters went up but no one ever called.  We came to find out that this little ferret, who she named Angel, was a little sugar addict.  He could sniff out anything that had sugar in
it and he would climb up, grab it and then go behind Steve’s dresser where he would stash it under clothes in one particular drawer.  It was hilarious – Steve would open his drawer and find all kinds of candy, sugar packets, even a large chocolate bar once under his clothes. Angel was a truly amazing little creature.

Little Angel used to make all of us laugh.  He would come in the bathroom while you were in the shower, find the pants you had just taken off and placed on the floor and he would climb in and out of the pants legs – peeking in and out as though these were his own personal ferret tunnels.  He was constantly jumping around, making funny noises & doing funny things making us all laugh.

goodbyes It was very, very sad for all of us when Angel finally passed many years later.  Morgan had given her little ferret a very appropriate name when they first found each other.  I truly believe Morgan’s little ferret is now with her again, jumping around, climbing onto her shoulder and giving her little kisses on her face.  Just the thought of this makes me happy.  Ferrets are pure happiness…

There is always something missing….Morgan.

missing youI can see it in everyone’s eyes – whenever family and friends are together enjoying each other’s company and having a celebration, there is something no one wants to mention, there is always something missing, and it’s Morgan.  Our sweet, gentle Morgan, whom everyone loved.

Morgan’s light was breathtaking…from the moment she was born and she looked into your eyes you would become mesmerized. Morgans iphone self

Now here come the holidays and once again Morgan with not be with us.  It is almost the 4th anniversary of her murder and I am not quite sure what to do.  If any of you have any suggestions as to how to go about honoring her life, and raising awareness on this upcoming December 2nd please let me know.  I would greatly appreciate any suggestions.

Team Morgan, you have been the wind beneath my wings all these past years and I would love nothing more than to feel the force of that wind on December 2nd.  Thank you all so very much!

Does someone in Colorado know where Lea’s body is?

Dianne Derby @ Co. Springs KKTV is running a segment on Mothers of Murdered and/or Missing children. The group segment will air this Monday (tomorrow, November 16th) with 19 year old Lea Porter’s individual story airing on Wednesday. Please share.

Rene Jackson’s 19-year-old daughter Lea was murdered last year in June. Her killer is behind bars, but her body has never been found. Rene believes someone has information that could lead police to Lea’s remains. 

Colorado’s 11 Call for Action Investigates five women and their heartbreaking stories of loss.

Watch and share this short video clip Colorado, Unsolved, Monday at 10 on KKTV 11 News. You or someone you know may be able to help these mothers find peace.

You can click on the short video of Rene that I have posted on https://www.facebook.com/morgansstalking

rene and lea

Does Colorado Protect Rogue Officers?

I just ran across this article http://www.denverpost.com/news/ci_28470805/colorado-laws-allow-rogue-officers-stay-law-enforcement in the Denver Post.

It is titled: Colorado laws allow rogue officers to stay in law enforcement.  Colorado’s rogue police officers continue to stay in law enforcement due to lenient state laws.

They wrote, “Roger Goldman, a nationally recognized expert on officer misconduct who has helped write laws establishing state police review panels, said Colorado’s lenient rules allow unfit officers to continue doing harm.”

It was an eye-opener for sure, and then I saw this article http://www.denverpost.com/news/ci_28952022/colorado-home-second-chance-police-officers-from-other

 I feel that Colorado’s law of original jurisdiction (Home Rule) creates the perfect climate for police corruption, and I truly believe this law needs to change – it needs to be abolished.

All power corrupts

A Father’s Devastation…love NEVER dies

IMG_0857This picture is a picture of a grease board Steve used to keep in the office at his shop.  One day Morgan came by to help out in his office, and she wrote this on his grease board.  She never mentioned that she wrote it, but of course the next morning when Steve opened his office he saw it, and he NEVER erased it.  He kept it on the grease board because it made him smile every time he looked at it.  He still has it today, but because he fears that it may accidentally get erased, he wrapped it in plastic and stored it away.  This is what we parents do when our children are taken from us.  When we no longer can see or hear them, and we do not want to loose the precious items they left behind.  Somehow seeing her writing makes it seem like she is just away at school, or on some grand adventure.

Tomorrow is Steve’s birthday.  It should be a day of celebration, but the days leading up to today have been extremely hard for him.  Every day became more and more emotional.  His heart has been torn in two. It has been almost 4 years since Morgan was murdered and there is no closure.

Morgan was his baby…she was our youngest child.  A surprise gift we received when we least expected it.  At the time she was born we already had a 13 year old daughter and a 10 year old son, but when Morgan entered this world we all fell in love – she completed us.  It is so hard for him, as it is me, to look through all the happy pictures of Morgan…it shouldn’t be, the pictures should make us smile, and they do, but then we start to cry.  It is like someone is pulling our hearts out of our chests.

So tomorrow everyone in our family will put on smiles and try our best to make Steve happy, at least for a little while, but in reality I know even if he can sustain a mask of happiness he will be crying inside.  Anyone can be a father, but only a special man can be a daddy, and Steve is, and was, a daddy to Morgan as well as our other 2 children, as well as to our niece who never knew her real father.  Steve is and always will be a daddy, and I know Morgan will be at his side all day tomorrow, even though he won’t see her – my hope is that he will feel her spirit come through, because of all the love she has for him…death can never destroy that love.  I wish Steve a happy birthday – he is the best daddy I could have ever hoped for as a father to my children, and I love him with all of my heart.