Time for a follow up on the candles.

The anniversary of Morgan’s death was so many emotions, too many for one day.  But the pictures of candles kept coming, and were just amazing.  From around the world I felt the awareness of stalking growing, just a tiny bit with every picture, and that became such a bright light for me.  I thank everyone who even thought about it, and I know in my heart that Morgan thanks you too.

There were thousands of pictures and they will be used in a graphic now, every single one, so just a warning, because the individual candles are going to end up really tiny, but their collective light will become bigger than life in the fight against stalking.

candle submitted for Morgan

December 1, 2011 (continued) – Day 122 of Morgan’s Stalking – It’s quiet, so why is there so much stress?

Morgan and her brightness

Morgan goes to the bank to make a deposit this morning for Steve.  I text her to let her know that I was able to speak with the mother of a witness the detective wanted to talk to – Morgan sends me a text back, “You rock!”  She then goes to her dad’s shop to help pack up his office.  When Steve and Nathan go back to the shop after lunch, Morgan goes to take a shower.  She has invites for the afternoon, but instead she has decided to help a friend find a job.  If he does not find job he will have to go back to Denver, and Morgan knows that will be bad for him.  He has worked hard to get where he is right now, and slipping back into old surroundings could create a great pressure on him to not maintain what he has accomplished.

She gets out of the shower and goes to her room.  She has the music playing, while she puts on make-up, does her hair, and dresses at her leisure.  I take a break from work and go into her room to chat while she is getting ready.  We talk about the Etsy dragonfly ID tag she found online, and wants to purchase for Wylah – I told her I could just order it when I sit back down to work at my computer.  Morgan said she didn’t have enough money yet, and would have to wait until after her babysitting job over the weekend.  I asked her how much it was, and told her I would just order it, and she could pay me back.  It was really nice to see her so bubbly, and actually putting on make-up and curling her hair, which she normally only did if she was going out somewhere special in the evening.  At 1:41 pm she walks out to the car with a freshly laundered shirt for her friend’s job interviews and hangs it up in the back of the car.  She goes and picks him up.  He is worried about his interviews, and Morgan calls him (on his cell) to encourage him at all their stops, while she waits in the car.  I wouldn’t go so far as to say she walked him in, but it was really important to her that he had a job or a really good prospect all lined up today.

After Morgan’s murder in 2012 we find out that on Facebook at 12:20 am on 12.1, early this morning, Hannah Hurlocker (Brooke Harris’ friend) updated her wall, “sowyy it sucks.” Then 37 minutes later she adds, “guess ima go then night”  Her friend ? Likes this. At 1:04 am still confused by the urgency of the requests to drop everything and come get her Stephen Campbell says ”Well u seemed pissed when we talked Wats up??”

Brooke is not happy he has not figured this out yet, and at 3:43 pm today she posts to Stephen Campbell, “why would you ask her that on facebook? On her wall, on a post that had nothing to do with that at all? You know how to get a hold of her.”  It remains questionable what was really happening until certain parties involved are asked to give their input, then it is very upsetting, and obvious to me.

I had an arrangement with Morgan that she would be home by 4:00 pm or call me within two hours after she left, so I could run some errands with her.  Nothing super important, but it always seems like if I don’t get through my list for the day I end up wishing the next day that I had, and since we were sharing a car we had to coordinate.

At 4:00 pm I still have not heard from Morgan, but I had just gone out to the garage to organize and drag out empty bins for the move.  By 4:30 pm it has been almost three hours and Morgan is a 1/2 hour late contacting me.  I text her to call me, she is still calling her friend regularly, probably still giving encouragement with each new interview.

Our neighborhood Lhasa’s are getting their evening walk up the street toward Brooke’s house at 4:29:30 pm and they look very happy.  By 4:48 pm I am getting anxious, in reality she is still helping her friend find the all important job, but I do not know this, only that she is not contacting me back, at least to tell me all is well.  I am worried & upset – I keep remembering that the detective said he thought the stalking was going to escalate.  Especially with all of the new unknowns that have been thrust into her stalking this week.  Detective Glassmire told me 2 days ago that he thinks her stalking is going to escalate, there will be increased patrols, searching in new places.  And we didn’t even know about the very disturbing chatter going on on Facebook at that time.

Morgan gets a text from Nathan from Steve’s phone, “Hey it’s Nathan. Just leaving Aspen just so ya know. I’m gonna get dropped off in c’dale.”  She does not answer, and her friend Calder tries three times to contact her before 6:00 pm.  Also, without an answer.

Steve is home and tells me we should go get something for dinner – I am incredulous for an instant, then I calm down – he feels like Mexican food, and a little grocery shopping after for some of Morgan’s favorites, like pomegranates.  During Morgan’s mystery sickness, years ago, which turned out to be chronic carbon monoxide exposure, Steve had this mental list of all the foods that would cheer her up.   And it would always work.  He thought she was looking just a little too tired and run down right now, and he wanted to get some of her favorites.  I went with him to the grocery store after dinner for that reason only.  Before we leave for dinner, and the grocery store, I lock the dogs up, which I normally do not do, but Morgan’s puppy Wylah had just chewed up a stuffed animal, and I had to clean up all the stuffing that she dispensed throughout the house – that was a BIG mistake to make, locking the dogs up in the laundry room, but I just wasn’t thinking clearly.

On the way to the restaurant Steve texted Morgan, “Hi Morgan we are going out to dinner in Carbondale are you interested in joking us?” He really meant, joining, but you know these “smart” phones.  Just as I was telling him that he knew that Morgan had not answered me for hours, and I was really getting worried, his phone did that incoming text sound.  He glanced at the screen, smiled, and then handed it to me.  I said, “oh sure she answers you”, and I didn’t know if I should feel relieved or frustrated.  His message from Morgan was, “Gah! I’m sorry. My phone’s little button got switched so my ringer was off. I’m just hanging out with Danny, but I’ll see you guys after?”

Just like that it was no big deal.  Steve wondered if we could just have a nice dinner now, and I told him sure.  Morgan started answering her other friends that she was just hanging out right now.  Steve told her, “Ok we will text you when we get home and then meet you there.” And she answered him, “K.”  I was officially relieved.  We talked about our move and of all the other things going on in the world  Steve wanted to set up Christmas in the new place so it would be there as we moved in, he thought it would be different, a little extra bit of happy in the midst of carrying, and unloading, and stressing and straining.  I told him I would think about it.

After dinner we shopped for a few things at the grocery store, and went home.  Rhonda, our next door neighbor, had just driven up, before Steve and I did.  We unloaded, and were deciding which room to pack first.  Morgan was still with her friend, watching a movie.

7:32:17 PM Morgan’s friend Nicole sent Morgan an important text – “Lady! We need to talk about breckenridge and get it all figured out!”  They were leaving before noon tomorrow to babysit for our returning military and allowing them to have a retreat with their spouses.  There is a group of children that loved Morgan, and two-year-olds were asking for her by name.  She either does not see this text or decides to wait to answer Nicole, because it is not immediate.

A person who will remain secret for some time, arrives home.  Morgan asks if she could spend the night at their house.  This person thinks for a moment about inviting Morgan, but then decides that day has been too tough, she has a headache and decides to have her sleep over some other night.  I have spoken with this person after Morgan’s murder, and she has felt horribly guilty about that one decision to send Morgan home for the night, sent her to her ultimate death.  No matter how much I try to convince her this is not true, I have not yet succeeded.  Morgan was scared to go home alone – yes, we were there in the house, but sleeping on the very other end of our big house…Morgan had been either having a friend sleep over at our house or she would sleep over a friends house for the past 2 weeks – that is how frightened she was.  I believe her intuition was screaming at her not to sleep at home, but Morgan was always concerned with others feelings and she said it was fine and she left.

I suddenly realize that I was supposed to text Morgan when we were headed home and I had completely forgotten.  I sent her a text at 7:48:57 pm that we are done shopping and heading home.  I go into her room and turn on her bedroom light and let Wylah into her room, she jumps on the bed and lies down, and it’s exactly 8:09 pm.

Right after I turn Morgan’s bedroom light off there is a bang on her window.  Reviewing cameras later we can see the big motion lights goes on at the same time.  Nothing obvious is seen on video, but then whatever whacked the glass, and set off the motion detector was out there.  At that time we didn’t know we should have been looking up instead of on the ground, where the cameras were pointed.

At 8:30 pm Morgan is in the car alone, driving home. She has made plans to go back out with her friend in the morning to go out to breakfast and return applications that will be filled out by then.  Morgan is confident a job can be had before her friend will have to return to Denver.

Morgan pulls off into the Catherine’s store parking lot at 8:36:38 pm and answers her text from Nicole about babysitting on the weekend, “F… I know. I haven’t talked to Amy. I have no idea what’s going on.”

She then drives over to her friend Calder’s house & talks to him and her other friend Cooper. She then drives Calder & herself over to a house where her friends Nathan, Kara & Kashandra hanging out. She visits with everyone, expecting Nathan to drive home with her as previously planned.  Morgan’s friend Kara later told me Morgan seemed very happy when they spoke, as did Kashandra & Calder. Morgan was hoping to get Nathan to come home with her to sleep over again, but he tells her no.  She goes outside to talk to Calder, who is outside smoking, and Nathan borrows her phone to contact someone.  Nathan reads the texts, and then sends a text to Joey, “Sorry man. Haven’t been near the phone for awhile. And whatever works for you man. I don’t care either way. The fact that you remembered this long is enough. You can forget about it. Just make sure you come chill soon. :)” We know all this later from reading and saving everything on Morgan’s phone.

Morgan leaves, and her two friend’s (Nathan & Calder’s) recollection of Morgan during that short time is completely opposite from each other.  Calder always seems enamored with Morgan and always loved to spend time with her, although now we now know he was a part of her terrorization – probably not thinking she could end up dead.  I also found out that Morgan was upset with Calder, because he had refused to give her the phone number of his friend who had told him about Keenan and his supposed girlfriend Morgan…our Morgan felt really betrayed by Calder, but in typical Morgan form she never stayed angry for long with anyone.  Nathan is concerned more about who she was with today and what is going on, because he still cares about her and would like to be together again- he is jealous.  She does not want to talk about it and this causes an awkwardness.  I found out later from Nathan that Morgan had asked him to come home with her and sleep over again so she would feel safer, but this night he said no.  Now, it’s just a little before 9:00 pm and Morgan hops in the car and heads for home.  Once again I am starting to get worried about Morgan and ask Steve to see if she is on her way home yet.  He texts her at 8:54:47 pm and asks if everything is OK?

Morgan does not answer, because she is driving and can not text.  She drives up into the driveway 9 minutes later. She goes through her normal routine in the car, and I am waiting for her on the porch, pepper spray in hand and her puppy on the leash, after I hear the driveway alarm go off.  As she opens the car door I begin to tell her how upset I am that earlier she did not answer calls or texts – I was so worried about her.  I remind her about her stalker, and how much I worry about her.  She does not answer, looks down and mumbles an unsavory comment as she walks by me and takes her puppies leash out of my hand.  Our eyes meet for a second, and I decide she is tired and OK.  (Now years later I wonder if that comment was even aimed at me or was she referring to Brooke because she was so upset over what she believed Brooke was doing to her?)  I stand in the foyer and watch her go into her room.  I then go to her bedroom door and knock, she says, “Go away I’m tired.”  So, I head down the hall to my bedroom on the other end of the house.

Tessi (our Newfoundland) was lying in the entryway close to Morgan’s door, just staring at the front door, as if just waiting and guarding.  She looks over at me, and I tell her let’s go to bed.  We usually left Tessi loose during the stalking, so she could wander the house all night in order to warn us if someone ever got in the house.  Steve did not want her loose that night because he thought she might bark and wake everyone up, because of the increased patrols. This is just one of the many things we did wrong this night that added up to the perfect storm. We were all so exhausted from lack of sleep. She paddles down the hall behind me and when I get into our room I ask Steve if he will talk to Morgan.  He asks if she is upset, and I say she might be.  Steve says he will wait ten minutes just in case.  No matter how mad we may make Morgan, it never lasts more than ten minutes.  I already know that in the morning she will apologize for what she said and explain what happened tonight, it will all make perfect sense, and it will be behind us.  It has happened like that on so many mornings, it is safe for me to say it has never failed.  I used to always tell Morgan, “You don’t have to apologize – heck your brother and sister never did when they got mad at me,” but Morgan was different and if she snapped at someone and didn’t think it was justified she would always apologize – she said everyone should always speak how they feel, and then they never have to feel bad later, so apologies were good.

I turned off the light and got into bed.  Two minutes later the video camera records motion coming over the berm toward the house.  We will not see it for some time – not until months after Morgan’s murder.

Steve has counted his imaginary time for Morgan to be happy, and he gets out of bed.  Morgie can get upset, but she never stays upset.  A good Zen Buddhist would never let their anger control them – and that was Morgan’s personality.

Steve walks to Morgan’s room and knocks, she answers.  Tessi has followed him back out of our room again and stations herself by the front door – smart and intuitive dog – too bad Steve and I did not listen to our dog.  Steve asks Morgan if he can come in, and she says, “Of course.”  He sees that she is on her phone texting, and he offers to come back later.  Morgan presses send for the last time on her phone, and announces, “Nope, all done for the night.”  She was lying across the bed in her jammies, on her stomach, and propped up on her elbows.  Her legs were folded at the knees and her ankles are crossed, gently moving back and forth.  She is smiling. And asks Steve what’s up?  They both know why he is there, because she had a moment of anger, and he wants to ask her about it.  This is something Steve and Morgan have done since she was a little girl.  She’s twenty now, and if you ask her she will admit it is something they have always done, but she will also never call her daddy to come in to cheer her up, he just always has good timing.  Tonight she does not need any cheering up.  Steve and her talk about developments in her life, how some friends of hers are doing better, and some just need a little more time.

Morgie helping Daddy

Steve talks to her about oil painting.  He has been so busy at work he has not had much time, but he wants to go in for another painting class, because he just got an email and the classes have started up again.  Morgan says she would really like that.  They talk about how her older sister really wants to make jewelry, and Morgan reminds him they are supposed to get a metal clay kiln for Christmas, and they can all use it.

Morgan is concerned about babysitting the next day because she is afraid she is contagious (she has been coughing a little), and she does not want to get all of the children sick, but she does not know if they can get a replacement for her on such short notice.

Steve tells her that she should wait until morning, she is getting to sleep early, and maybe she will feel much better in the morning.  He remarks that she already looks much better since Monday morning, and if she had not he would have never let her come to the shop and pack bins for him.

Steve confessed that he wished he could run faster and he could catch this guy, and it could be over.  He is choked up, because defending his family is a huge thing for Steve.  Morgan tells him it’s OK, and I love you daddy.  He tells her how much he loves her and says goodnight.  This was the last time he would ever speak with her – he just didn’t know it at the time.  Now I can go over things in my mind, and realize there were signs that something might be wrong…Tessi didn’t want to stay in our bedroom, she wanted to stay in the entry staring at the front door, and Steve had to drag her to our room, and close the door.  I always left the bedroom door open, just in case, so Tessi could patrol the house if she needed to, but we were all so tired Steve put her in our room, and closed the door.  Next mistake we made, part of the “Perfect Storm” that night was that Steve thought we should both have a good nights sleep so we both took sleeping pills that night – I usually did not, because I never wanted to miss any unusual sounds, or Morgan trying to send me a text, or if she had to push her panic button (although that sound was loud enough to wake us up), but this night I agreed and I did take a whole sleeping pill.

At 9:52 pm our neighbor Matt, from across the street comes home, and right behind him is a car, and I think I know the occupants, but am not sure, so I won’t say.  And a few minutes later Brooke’s friend, Hannah Hurlocker, is on her Facebook wall again, this time adding, “Some people are like slinkys. Pointless but amusing to watch when you kick them down the stairs. ?”

At 11:56 pm the 1st of December is just about over and the Great Room video camera catches something moving behind our next-door neighbor Rhonda’s pine tree.  But we are all fast asleep by now and don’t know what evil is approaching.

Then after midnight – now December 2nd, Police reports later show the “suspect” did not go to work on 12.2.2011 until after midnight – Morgan was already dead by the time he clocked in at work @ 2:00 am, so when he says he was at work, and on camera at the time she died, he is lying – he has no alibi for the time she was murdered, and his job was less than a 5 minute drive from our house – he clocked in to work at 2:00 am and worked till 6:37 am & then from 7:07 am – 10:30 am… so he was free this evening to plausibly be Morgan’s murderer and he has NO alibi!

Click here to read about the 123rd day of Morgan’s stalking and the first day of the investigation into her suspicious death https://morgansstalking.com/?p=2688

Just wanted to share a birthday card Steve and I gave to Morgan on her 10th birthday – the inside said, “Angels dwell in the hearts of a very special daughters like you.” We always felt like Morgan was an angel from Heaven ever since the day she was born…and now she is an angel in Heaven

November 29, 2011 – Day 120 of Morgan’s Stalking – Detective Glassmire seems full of hope!

New Pointe shoes, ready for a workout!

Morgan’s friend Nathan slept over last night and she slept out on the couch as well.  They watched movies till late in the night and it was a quiet night for us all.  In the morning Nathan and Steve left for work and Morgan got dressed to go to ballet and dance classes, but then she was a little too squeamish and decided to go to her first class, and see how it went, and then she came home, and skipped her second class.  She was thinking maybe a new flu was coming on and she didn’t want to infect her friends.  She also wanted to be back on her feet for the weekend, as she would be taking care of young children for the returning military families, so I encouraged her to take it easy and rest, and she did.

Steve came by at 3:00 and was all caught up with his work.  He was ready to start the move of his shop and could not wait for the whole move of shop and house to be complete.  Of course we had not really started yet so that sounded very optimistic.  He dropped Nate off in Carbondale and went to his now old shop to pack his office.  Morgan went to Carbondale with Wylah and I waited at home for Detective Glassmire.  I thought it was just going to be another regular meeting with nothing much to report, but I was in for a pleasant surprise.

At 3:51 pm I sent a text to Detective Glassmire, “Rob do you know about when you might be here?  Morgan is about 10 minutes from our house and I just want to let her know to come home in time.  Thanks.”  He replied back, “I am in Carbondale now working on my laptop, I can get there anytime, let me know.”  He also told me he was just coming to check the cameras and Morgan could just stay in Carbondale, so I relayed that message to her.

Detective Glassmire came over and I helped him get the ladder from the garage. He went out and checked his cameras and saw nothing.  I explained to him about the motion detectors that had been taken from their “perches” and moved to the ground and he shook his head.  I went on to tell him that Steve had been up really early researching the event because it really bothered him, how it had been done with such apparent ease.

I told him how our motion equipment had been detecting something in the front corner of the house and Steve had come up with yet another plan to paint two detectors to match the surroundings and then placed them both aimed at the corner of the house.  Then he made sure that two of the video cameras were aimed right at them and was so certain he would catch something.  He wore clothes to bed that night he was so sure.

But I told Detective Glassmire that it wasn’t even fifteen minutes later that they were both on the ground and nothing was caught on the cameras.  So what was really bothering Steve was that this morning until he saw a “Myth Busters Youtube” that showed how easy it was to defeat a motion detector and he later found how a person with a laser light, something he had seen off in the distance months ago, could mess with our video cameras easily and Steve ended up leaving for work completely distraught that it might be that the stalker was slowing down for winter and it might well be that he had figured ways around all of the deterrents we had and that was why we weren’t seeing anything anymore.  But then I told him how Morgan was still getting startled awake at all hours.

I asked the detective if it was possible we were so over-vigilant that we had begun hearing things or was the stalker right here more than ever?  I told him how we were coming to wits end with all of this.  Glassmire looked at me for a second and then bent down picked up a dirt clod from the ground and flung it at our house.  I jumped and it struck the house with a loud “BANG”.  He looked at me and said, “You are not crazy Toni, there is your stalker, he is still here.”

I agreed with the detective and told him that Steve does not know what to do.  Rob told me that he thought if anything he was going to escalate now.  That really scared me and I asked what we should do?  He told me not to worry, but be careful.  He was going to pick up Keenan’s hours the following Tuesday and he thought that would be a big step, maybe even the final breakthrough in an arrest.

This was shocking to me. I had not expected to hear that.  A long time ago, we were told an arrest would come only after catching him at the house.  I asked him if he really thought that, and he said that he did.  He also said the formal interview with Morgan would help too, and that was scheduled for the following Tuesday.  It was exciting to think that all of a sudden it had come so far.  This morning Steve was thinking it was all a lost cause and now it was on the verge of ending – in arrest.

We said our goodbyes around 5:00 pm and Detective Glassmire put the ladder away and left.  I called Steve and had a quick talk with him about all of the positive developments and he was cheered up.  He left to come home, and just as I began to peel potatoes for dinner, there was a loud “BANG” again on the front of the house that was sharper and louder than Detective Glassmire’s dirt clod.  It was far more like a gunshot against the garage, and I ran out front to see what it was.  The dogs were startled, as was I, but my first thought was a sonic boom (which I had never heard in Colorado before – only as a child in California) or maybe something large, like the ladder in the garage falling over and hitting something.

Only like everything else there was nothing, by the time I got to the front of the house there was no car just leaving the street, no people closing the front door behind them – nothing.  I just stood and watched the empty street, tree branches slowly waving in a light breeze and giving up their last leaves.  I opened the garage and searched its corners – nothing was out of place.  It was so maddening!

I closed up and went back in the house.  Then I texted Morgan when dinner was going to be and asked when could she be home.  She told me that Nate had just left for the bar and she was waiting for him, but thought it wouldn’t be more than fifteen minutes.

Steve drove up and I heard his truck,  he came in and we talked about my afternoon meeting with Detective Glassmire.  Steve was calmed so much by all the good news and went to clean up before dinner.

Morgan came home, ate with us and was very excited by everything the detective had told me.  She went to sleep around 10:00 pm, and as I got in bed I saw flashlights in back of house.  Steve told me it was Patrol Officers looking for something, and as I was falling asleep, I told Steve they were increasing the patrols by the house too.  It was all such good news and I was only too content to not argue with any of it.

Today is November 24, 2012 – And as I look back that night was so positive.  I really felt that they really, really wanted to catch this stalker and protect Morgan – it just hasn’t happened yet.  I know it all went horribly wrong but I am still not sure why.  Parts of the truth are still hidden in the shadows.  But as Steve and I have found out bit by bit this year, so much happened over the next few days that was stacked against Morgan, only there was also the component of so much that did not happen to help protect her.  For others we must change not just one but both of those factors.

I missed Morgan so very much this week, and I knew it would be hard.  I want to thank all of you for your emails and words of encouragement.  I agree with so many of you that after I make it through this week I will get stronger and stronger.  I can’t wait to get back home and put it all together now, even the parts I have been putting off.  This year has been such a blur when I think about it, but for some reason I can’t really explain, it has all become more in focus now.  Thank you all for sharing Morgan’s story with me, it has been such an honor to be able to share it.

Click here to read about the 121st day of Morgan’s stalking https://morgansstalking.com/?p=2425

November 28, 2011 – Day 119 of Morgan’s Stalking

The boys at the skate park

In the very early hours of the day Morgan was startled awake by banging on her window.  She was really tired and couldn’t find her phone in the dark.  She didn’t want to get up and turn on the light because that excites her stalker and then she can count on “his attention” for a much longer time.

She just lay in bed and waited.  That wait, she guessed was after midnight, but really early.  She drifted back to sleep until 5:00 am when a sharp loud bang woke her up again.  Morgan told me at breakfast that she almost pressed her panic button, but didn’t want to wake us.  Steve reminded her for the umpteenth time, that if anything happens, let us know.  Morgan promised she would.

Ballet was this morning and that always had her smiling no matter what else was going on.  After classes she grabbed her camera and went to the skateboard park to photograph the boys doing their tricks.

Morgan loved to quietly master a new skill.  Action photography was her latest quest and the skateboard park was a great setting for her.  Close-ups, groups, fast, slow, all the different angles.  She explained it all to me in great detail.  It was an odd year in that snow would have usually closed the park a while ago but the ground was cold, but clear and good enough for a group of young men to be doing something they liked, and for Morgan to bundle up and photograph them.

Just before 5:00 pm I called Morgan to say her father was cooking dinner.  She got off the phone with me and called him to see if he wanted help.  He told he had news and they would talk over dinner.

At dinner we all discussed the move.  Steve had committed to the new shop and there were two places for us a very short walk away.  Then a few more that were within a block or so.  First big decision was before or after the holidays.  Steve and I were leaning toward sooner and Steve was asking Morgan if she would like to work in his office for a few hours each afternoon and Morgan was very excited about that.  In the past his shops were always in places that became deserted around 4:00 pm and Morgan never felt safe so when she did help Steve with his work it was mostly at home.  But now if she could walk with Wylah over to his office and have people around, she thought it would work out great.

Morgan was going babysitting over the weekend and was going to need my car so we talked about that a little bit.  She also had quite a few babysitting jobs lined up in December and she was wondering how to keep track.  I told her I would see if next year’s calendars would have this December in them, and if they did I would just get one for her.  The detectives were coming tomorrow, so I reminded Morgan.

Today it is November 23, 2012 – I remember so vividly how the stalking had become something we wanted to ignore.  It seemed like we were never going to stop him, although we would never admit it.  And Steve and I talked a lot about how strange it had become.

The term “lulled to sleep” may sound completely out of place, but it was what happened to some extent.  We had come to “expect” certain things from the stalker.  I hear it over and over again now.  Invisible lines are created unintentionally, and your stalker does not cross them, this gives you a mistaken feeling of security.  You want to feel safe in your world.  I have heard stories over my life of people spending time in a part of town that was down on its luck, and car alarms, maybe cars racing around at all hours and even gunfire was not out of the ordinary – on a daily basis.  And they stayed, and even got used to it somehow.

As I approach a year since Morgan was killed I still am not sure how to advise someone on how to really stop their stalker.  However: it is something that has become very important to me.  Real solutions to stalking would mean so much to Steve and I.  Not a better way to ignore the growing problem, as is far to often the case today – but a better way to stop it, to return lives to those who have had theirs taken from them.  And a better way for justice to mean something more than a hollow promise.  Morgan’s rights were taken from her in so many ways, and they continue to be taken away by people that don’t know the facts of her case, but believe any lies that they hear on the Internet as the Gospel truth…how sad.

Click here to read about the 120th day of Morgan’s stalking https://morgansstalking.com/?p=2411