January 3, 2012 (over a year ago) was a quiet day. Morgan’s older sister and her husband left and Steve and I were finally all alone in the house. We drove over to the college to drop off another picture of Morgan that Gary in the Theatre Department wanted to use in their glass case along with the information about the scholarship program that we had set up in Morgan’s name. So many more things are to be realized in the next few months, but on this day we have no way of knowing this. I have a strong feeling, not coming from my mind, but instead it is emanating from my soul…that at this time it is for me and me alone to follow the path I have been shown, I know my soulmate Steve will join me sometime down that path, but for right now I need to start following the path by myself, because he is suffering so much over Morgan that he can not focus. I can feel what Morgan needs me to do for her, and that is exactly what I will do. I need to get away from this house, and this horrible neighborhood so I can think and feel again…from that thinking, and talking to close friends and relatives, will come a much clearer path – this much I do know.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012 – nothing notable happened – it was extremely, and deathly quiet today.
Thursday, January 05, 2012 – I spoke with Dr. Tracy Simms today, Morgan’s OB/GYN. This is the first time I have actually spoken with Dr. Simms since Morgan died. Morgan and I both went to see Dr. Simms for our Annual exams on Wednesday, November 30th in Grand Junction (she was the last doctor to see Morgan 36 hours before she was killed on Thursday night, December 1st, she died sometime before 6:00 am Friday morning, December 2nd when I found her). I saw Dr. Simms before Morgan, for my appointment and asked that she might take a look at Morgan, because Morgan looked so exhausted and pale. Toni explained to Tracy about the stalker, and everything that had happened over the last 4 months, and she said she would talk to Morgan.
Tracy said she did talk to Morgan on Wednesday, November 30th that same day, and suggested that maybe she could give her a prescription for an anti-depressant to help her feel better, or possibly something to help her sleep. Tracy said Morgan told her that she was not depressed at all, she was just very stressed out over the stalker, and medication wouldn’t help, and she did not need or want a prescription. She also said Morgan expressed that she felt like things were moving in a positive direction (as far as the investigation), and was upbeat and hopeful things would be getting better.
Today, the day I am writing this blog is Wednesday, February 27, 2013. It has been such a long road that Steve and I have traveled since Morgan left this world. We have met so many wonderful people along the way that want to help get Morgan’s case opened…and all the experts have assured us that it will be opened if we never give up. And please be assured, we will NEVER give up.
But I do have to keep reminding myself of this quote…in order to keep calm, and not worry about how long this is taking.
“Don’t expect everyone to understand your journey. Especially if they’ve never had to walk your path!”
Hi Toni, I have been wanting to tell you for a very long time now, I so enjoy the beautiful photography that you include in your blog. Are all the photos taken by Morgan? She certainly had “an eye” for beauty in small things, didn’t she?
I have tried to use only Morgan’s photography and most of them are hers, but of course some pictures were taken by Steve or myself, and the few obvious ones that I mention were sent to me via Facebook, candle pictures were sent to me and her cousin contributed at least one that I remember. In the near future we will pick out a few pictures of Morgan’s that people have asked if they could purchase and we will put them up for sale to help raise money, but with everything we are doing lately there just doesn’t seem to be enough hours in the day so please be patient with me if you are one of the people that were interested in purchasing a framed photograph. Thanks Deborah!
“Don’t expect everyone to understand your journey. Especially if they’ve never had to walk your path!”
This is so true in life. Thanks for sharing and helping others learn and grow through your eyes. We love you!!!
Thanks Ada for the vote of confidence. I really hope this is helping a lot of people, but we plan to do so much more and all of you give us the strength to keep going! Love you.
Teri, my heart breaks, the more I read.Please know you are both(Steve) so loved, thru out the world.Please get in touch with Rhonda Saunders, author of Whisper of Fear to get more attention to your story!! Be patient, your time, will come.
Thank you so very much – that really melts my heart. I looked on the Internet for Rhonda Saunders and she sounds like a wonderful person to talk to so I will try to get her contact info and give her a call. Thank you so much for the wonderful suggestion.
Hello, Toni and Steve.
I am currently watching your Dr Phil episode in Australia and I find it SO hard to believe that this girl, Brooke, is innocent, her eyes, her facial expressions, her whole blasé attitude, it really seems to me that she knows something.
You as a mother know your beautiful daughter better than anyone. In your heart of hearts you know what has happened.
I can’t even imagine how frustrating it must be, in an episode of Dr Phil I found myself shouting at the TV, but to be there, 5 feet away, to live it, everyday, I just can’t even fathom how you do it. You have some amazing restraint and self control.
One day the truth will come out, how can someone hide that? It will only be a matter of time before the guilt gets too much.
Just watching broke my heart and I pray to God that justice gets done as soon as possible, so you can all lay this to rest, mourn and live your lives without having this shadow over you, without having to prove anything to anyone.
I’m 19, and I think about the life I have ahead of me, Morgan had the same, it literally makes me tear up thinking of the life lost, such a beautiful girl.
I really hope you get justice and closure very soon.
You’ll be in my thoughts and prayers.
All my love, Emily xxx