{"id":5818,"date":"2015-07-22T16:53:15","date_gmt":"2015-07-22T22:53:15","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/morgansstalking.com\/?p=5818"},"modified":"2015-07-22T16:53:15","modified_gmt":"2015-07-22T22:53:15","slug":"honestly-i-just-want-to-see-you-be-brave-was-my-birthday-wish","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/morgansstalking.com\/?p=5818","title":{"rendered":"Honestly, I Just Want To See You Be Brave…was my birthday wish"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Kauai<\/a>Yesterday was a day I was not looking forward to – it was my birthday. \u00a0For the days leading up to it my heart was hurting more and more. \u00a0All I could think of was the last birthday that I celebrated with Morgan. \u00a0It was a really good memory, but also so very painful for me only because I know I will never have another holiday or birthday with Morgan. \u00a0My reality is forever changed.<\/p>\n

July 21, 2011 I woke up and couldn’t think of anything that I’d like to do to celebrate my birthday. \u00a0Steve & Morgan had both asked me what I wanted to do, but I could not really think of anything. \u00a0Then in the late afternoon Morgan came home with Rainer. \u00a0Steve said we were all going out to dinner. \u00a0It was a great dinner and we all had fun talking and joking about things. \u00a0When we arrived home Morgan brought out a birthday cake she had gotten for me, put the candles on and lit them – they all sang happy birthday. \u00a0It was really nice.<\/p>\n

Then after we all had cake Rainer & Morgan went in her room to get something. \u00a0They came out with little sheepish grins on their faces and gave me a present. \u00a0I opened the card – it was from both of them. \u00a0It was so sweet. \u00a0Then I opened the present…I couldn’t believe it. \u00a0It was a black metal bell with a figure of a horse on the top. \u00a0It was meant to be mounted on the side of the house, by the front door. \u00a0It was a copy of one of the old bells that moms would ring in order to “call” their family to the house for dinner.<\/p>\n

Morgan knew I missed the ranch her dad had built where she had been born in Old Snowmass, CO. \u00a0She knew I wanted so much to build another ranch and she said with this present I would already have the first thing to attach to the outside of the “future” ranch house. \u00a0I actually started to cry because I realized from the sparkle in her eyes that she truly believed at that time that her dad would build another ranch. \u00a0I love Morgan so much – and I miss her so much, and no, I will never get over it. \u00a0I lost Morgan, her family lost her, her friends lost her, the world lost her…she was taken against her will and at the hands of another. \u00a0My dream now is not the dream I had of building another ranch, it is now the dream of getting justice for Morgan, and fighting for all the victims and families of stalking, missing persons, and homicide. \u00a0My passion now is for justice – but that little bell will still ring one day, maybe not to call everyone to dinner, but it will ring out in celebration because my heart knows someday there will be justice.<\/p>\n

Anyway, getting back to my birthday yesterday, it did not turn out to be a sad day for me. \u00a0I “felt” Morgan in the morning and throughout the day. \u00a0Every time I started to cry she “blasted” me with what I can only explain as a blast of heat that created tingles down my spine. \u00a0It seemed like she was saying, “Don’t cry – you have too much to do, and I am still here with you.” \u00a0Because of Morgan’s presence, an amazing friend, and my loving family I ended up having a very magical birthday. \u00a0Love really is everything!<\/p>\n

Then I was given another message, “Don’t have fear.” \u00a0I immediately thought, “I am not fearful.” \u00a0Calming down and thinking about it I realized that when I get really sad maybe it is caused by fear. \u00a0Fear of that 1% feeling that maybe Morgan won’t get justice. \u00a0Fear that all these other victims and their families will continue to suffer with no white knight riding in to right the wrongs that have been thrown at them. \u00a0With that realization something happened, the song BRAVE by Sara Barellis came on my computer…and it was really loud! \u00a0The emotion that I felt when that song came on was immense! \u00a0At that very moment I felt all my determination come back – I will not be fearful, I promise you Morgan, I will be brave and I will not allow fear to silence me.<\/p>\n

\n
\n

Sara Bareilles<\/a>\u00a0\u2013 Brave Lyrics<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
You can be amazing
\nYou can turn a phrase into a weapon or a drug
\nYou can be the outcast
\nOr be the backlash of somebody\u2019s lack of love
\nOr you can start speaking up
\nNothing\u2019s gonna hurt you the way that words do
\nAnd they settle \u2018neath your skin
\nKept on the inside and no sunlight
\nSometimes a shadow wins
\nBut I wonder what would happen if youSay what you wanna say
\nAnd let the words fall out
\nHonestly I wanna see you be braveWith what you want to say
\nAnd let the words fall out
\nHonestly I wanna see you be braveI just wanna see you
\nI just wanna see you
\nI just wanna see you
\nI wanna see you be braveI just wanna see you
\nI just wanna see you
\nI just wanna see you
\nI wanna see you be braveEverybody\u2019s been there, everybody\u2019s been stared down
\nBy the enemy
\nFallen for the fear and done some disappearing
\nBow down to the mighty
\nDon\u2019t run, stop holding your tongue
\nMaybe there\u2019s a way out of the cage where you live
\nMaybe one of these days you can let the light in
\nShow me how big your brave is<\/p>\n

Say what you wanna say
\nAnd let the words fall out
\nHonestly I wanna see you be brave<\/p>\n

With what you want to say
\nAnd let the words fall out
\nHonestly I wanna see you be brave<\/p>\n

Innocence, your history of silence
\nWon\u2019t do you any good
\nDid you think it would?
\nLet your words be anything but empty
\nWhy don\u2019t you tell them the truth?<\/p>\n

Say what you wanna say
\nAnd let the words fall out
\nHonestly I wanna see you be brave<\/p>\n

With what you want to say
\nAnd let the words fall out
\nHonestly I wanna see you be brave<\/p>\n

I just wanna see you
\nI just wanna see you
\nI just wanna see you
\nI wanna see you be brave<\/p>\n

I just wanna see you
\nI just wanna see you
\nI just wanna see you
\nSee you be brave<\/p>\n

I just wanna see you
\nI just wanna see you
\nI just wanna see you<\/p>\n

I just wanna see you
\nI just wanna see you
\nI just wanna see you<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

Songwriters: BAREILLES, SARA \/ ANTONOFF, JACK<\/div>\n
Brave lyrics \u00a9 Sony\/ATV Music Publishing LLC<\/div>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Yesterday was a day I was not looking forward to – it was my birthday. \u00a0For the days leading up to it my heart was hurting more and more. \u00a0All I could think of was the last birthday that I … Continue reading 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